Commitment and Aging on ‘The Golden Bachelor’

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In August, Julia Jacobs visited a Mediterranean-style mansion in Agoura Hills, California, the setting of “The Golden Bachelor.” The show is a spin-off of the popular reality TV franchise “Bachelor,” with a surprising twist: contestants are at least 60 years old.

“The show comes at a time when there are increasing sensitivities about who is fit to fall in love on television,” said Jacobs, a culture reporter for The New York Times, who visited the set for an article about the reality dating series .

During the show’s premiere on September 28, viewers met Gerry Turner (pronounced Gary), a 72-year-old retired widow from Indiana looking for romance, and nearly two dozen women hoping to woo him on national television . Their relationships unfold on the air every Thursday.

Audiences seem to love it: the series premiere was the most-watched debut for a ‘Bachelor’ franchise season since 2021 and the most watched of all ‘Bachelor’ premieres on the streaming platform Hulu.

But it’s not all roses: Amanda Hess, a major critic for The Times, wrote in a recent column about how the show portrays older women. The participants, she noted, perform stunts such as riding a motorcycle to the set and performing a “ridiculous” striptease involving a walker.

“It honors older people, but only if they fit into a very narrow image of youthful sexiness,” she said.

In a recent conversation, Jacobs and Hess discussed the show’s multi-generational appeal and the ways in which it differs from previous “Bachelor” seasons. This interview has been edited and condensed.

Are you a fan of “The Bachelor”?

AMANDA HESS I’ve seen many seasons and I’ve been saying for years that they should do a “Bachelor” with widows and divorcees. That’s why I was curious about this version.

JULIA JACOBS I’m not a dedicated viewer, but I do enjoy writing about dating shows.

Some readers may wonder: Why is The Times writing this reality TV show?

HESS It tells a story about how we see ourselves and how we see elders, how we see marriage and second marriage. It will be a starting point for a conversation that I think our readers will be interested in.

JACOBS It was a hugely interesting topic on social media, and even at a senior center in New Jersey, where I went to watch the first episode. For some people, the ‘Bachelor’ franchise feels like the same old show – season after season – and this twist brought something new and worth talking about.

Besides the age of the participants, what sets this show apart from other versions of “The Bachelor”?

HESS The stakes are so high because many of the women have been married before. Many lost their husbands. They know what marriage is like. That makes the show both more appealing and harder to watch for me.

JACOBS There isn’t much drama between the women. Normally you have a lot of women pulling each other out of dates, like, “Can I grab him?” But that doesn’t really happen here.

HESS The drama takes place in every person.

Why do you think this show resonates with viewers across generations?

JACOBS The discussions between Gerry and the women he dates are more substantive. These women have lived for six to seven decades. They have a career and a family. This show doesn’t define their lives. And I think that has allowed them to become a little freer in their dialogue.

HESS I have created several profiles of artists and celebrities who are in their 70s and 80s. People in their twenties are building their careers and their personalities, but when you interview older people, they’ve already done that; they can tell you what they really think about how it all went down. And I think it’s similar for the women of “The Golden Bachelor.”

Julia, one statistic that stood out to me from your article was that the average viewer age for ABC, the network that airs the show, is 64. Why has it taken so long for a network to tap dating shows for this demographic?

JACOBS The producers said this show had been in the making for ten years. They didn’t have a clear answer as to why it had taken so long, but they said they felt like it came at a time when they were seeing a lot of messages about empowerment as we grow older. They mentioned that Martha Stewart appeared on the cover of Sports Illustrated and that John Stamos posted a nude photo on Instagram for his 60th birthday.

HESS The baby boomers are a culturally dominant generation.

JACOBS They are certainly dominant in terms of cable viewers.

We’ve talked a lot about the show’s successes, but what about if it doesn’t work for you?

HESS I don’t like seeing women at any age having to justify the way they look at men. If you’ve never seen “The Bachelor,” the first episode of “The Golden Bachelor” will seem like the most sexist, ageist thing you’ve ever seen; one of the women did a striptease wearing an ‘old’ wig and dress, as if to say, ‘Don’t worry, I’m not like those other old people!’

JACOBS I want to see more unfiltered interactions. You often hear Gerry and the women talk about their connection, but you don’t often see it in action. I’m interested in the everyday conversations about who they are, where they grew up and what their families are like.

Would you like to add anything?

HESS I wonder if there will be a ‘Golden Bachelorette’. I’d like to see a group of older men.

JACOBS That’s something we’ll definitely keep an eye on. Maybe that’s our next story.