‘Low-fat’ Christmas decor is a Scrooge-esque craze, garland everything and add glitter
THE latest trend is sober, festive decor, but interiors guru Laurence, 59, is slamming it for being Scrooge-esque.
Honestly, anyone getting into minimalism at Christmas needs to get a grip.
9
9
Bare wooden branches and industrial metal frames? There’s just no excuse for it.
I’m afraid anyone following this trend, which is increasing in popularity on the high street this year, must be seriously insecure – and probably own hairless cats.
The whole point of this midwinter festival is indulgence and absolute indulgence in excess and pleasure.
We should be trying to build up a stockpile of beautiful, fantastically decorated memories that will last us into the dreary January and February – not bring the whole thing back.
This whole idea of making Christmas ‘modern’, with sad, sparse trees and other boring decorations, is just the most ridiculous concept ever.
It will never be modern. The whole point of Christmas is that it is a time of tradition and childlike wonder.
It’s when you see how beautiful and sparkling your world can be, when everything outside of it is boring.
I learned this the hard way when my two daughters, Celine, 29, and Hermione, 25, were very little.
I had done a Christmas themed photo shoot for a magazine and I had brought home some small terracotta pots with burlap bows for our Christmas tree.
Celine gasped: “No, this can’t be Christmas – this isn’t what it looks like.”
She was shocked – and rightly so. Christmas should be graceful and beautiful.
The idea of having a ‘low-fat’ Christmas, when it comes to decorating, is simply the worst thing in the world.
I feel sorry for those who think they can get away with making bows from trendy scraps of linen.
Lurex and cocktails
Or that having a twig in the corner of the room will give a kind of festive atmosphere.
It’s not.
They might as well have a mummified Scrooge in the lounge.
It would have the same effect.
I’m actually very tolerant of those people who go completely over the top and cover the outside of their house with hundreds of lights
Laurence
Historically, Christmas is a festival of lights.
People all over the world light up the darkest places, even in the darkest moments.
I’m actually very tolerant of those people who go completely over the top and cover the outside of their house with hundreds of lights.
Why not? You see it in America, where the whole place radiates a rather garish glow.
But pampering is very personal.
The worst thing you can do is follow what everyone else is doing.
Even slaves to the dreadful gray naissance that has taken over homes in recent years are taking this opportunity to loosen up and add some sparkle.
I say be as sparkly as possible, wear as much lurex as you can imagine, drink cocktails and eat delicious things.
9
That said, there just needs to be some sophistication when decorating your home – and yourself.
So please, none of those synthetic party onesies and matching pajamas.
Or those awful slippers that you put both feet in.
They are terribly dangerous and not glamorous at all.
Christmas is about becoming something you normally aren’t.
It’s a time to spice up your life and flirt with the dark art of some pretty scary color combinations in the home.
I’m enjoying bright oranges and peacock greens this winter.
There’s a ton of these in stores right now.
And I’ve always been a fan of festive streamers: the bushier, the better.
You can always shorten them. I’m known for decorating everything I see, even the flat screen TV.
You can hang baubles and small gifts on the larger garlands and drape some LED lights over them. They look spectacular.
While it’s great to have your own family traditions, it’s also fun to keep moving forward and create a few new ones along the way.
When I moved to the Cotswolds I had to embrace my new low ceilings and ditch my usual huge real tree. Then my swinging started.
Years ago we had this nativity scene that we put out every December when my daughters were young.
But one year Jesus’ cradle went missing – you can imagine the sadness – so we dropped it on a ridged chip instead.
Yes, really. I can’t remember the flavor of the chips, but they worked wonderfully and we brought out that same chip crib every Christmas.
Shiny and graceful
It took about twenty years before it finally crumbled.
This year my eight-year-old grandson Albion is hoping to inject his manga obsession into our Christmas.
I can work with that and make some Manga decorations.
Trying to fight this with minimalism really shows that you ARE a Scrooge and a Grinch.
Laurence
One of the most important things I would wish for everyone at Christmas is that you surrender all control and welcome absolutely everything into your home.
I’m talking about sparkle, light, color and everything that is shiny and graceful.
Trying to fight this with minimalism really shows that you ARE a Scrooge and a Grinch.
And the worst part is denying yourself, not to mention the risk of accidentally getting impaled on the branches of your Spartan metal tree.
9
All this said, I grew up with the Christmases of the 1960s and 1970s, which encompassed a period of Scandinavian chic in the home.
But this was all put on the shelf for two weeks each year, when my family would bring out a striking gold and white tinsel tree.
It was like an incarnation of Christmas in the space age – and it was all quite wonderful.
One of my fondest childhood memories of Christmas was when the lights went out.
They were almost kinky and inappropriate with their bright berry red color.
Colored lamps were a rarity at the time.
What I hate today almost as much as minimalism at Christmas is a faux-Dickensian Christmas.
And the ones influenced by films like Home Alone, with their huge, unfeasible trinkets that hide the entire tree.
But I would like to end on a positive festive note.
A big part of Christmas – and one of the best parts – is the effort it takes to get everything ready.
Taking time out of our busy lives to do something that is fundamentally pointless is both rare and wonderful.
It’s about avoiding the easy solution and showing your loved ones that they are worth it – and that you are too.
That’s why I encourage you to take your decorating even further this year and see how original you can really be.
LAURENCE’S CHRISTMAS DECOR PICKS
9
9
9
9
9
