Behaviorist reveals the four easy-to-miss signs your partner is cheating – could you spot them?

We all know the obvious signs: a piece of clothing that isn’t yours, arriving home late without an excuse or a dating app on the phone.

But without this kind of hard evidence, It can be difficult to know if you are right when you have suspicions about a cheating partner.

Now a psychotherapist has shared four easy-to-miss signs that a spouse may be having an affair.

According to Cornwall-based Bhavna Raithatha, recognized by the British Association for Counseling and Psychotherapy, the lesser-known warning signs are more than just subtle behavioral changes.

According to Bhavna Raithatha from Cornwall, recognized by the British Association for Counseling and Psychotherapy, the lesser-known warning signs are more than just subtle behavioral changes.

They don’t leave you – on the contrary

It is often thought that a cheater would lose all interest in sex since he has it elsewhere. But this is not always the case, says Ms Raithatha.

She told MailOnline: ‘Intimacy is physical and emotional. What you have shared with your partner is very sacred. It really bonds us.

‘When you have an affair you have an increased libido, you become a kind of Duracell bunny.

‘And partners, who may temporarily feel guilty about this, forward this increased sex drive to their current partner.

“But it can just be a physical release to release tension — not emotional.”

‘Many of my clients have realized that their partner is having an affair while they are making love.

‘Suddenly their partner is just going through the motions, for example there is no eye contact and this is heartbreaking.’

But a once “really good intimate life” suddenly going “dead in the water” can also be a telltale sign.

‘Especially in men, they can experience a form of erectile dysfunction, because the emotion is just not there and so they cannot get up.

‘They will suddenly sThey make excuses not to have sex, and the reason is because they want to be loyal to their new person.”

You may have thought that a cheating partner would lose sexual desire for you, but the opposite is true, experts say.

They’re glued to their phones… even more than usual

Ms Raithatha admits it can be difficult to define what constitutes ‘excessive’ phone use, given the online world we live in.

“But unfortunately, if they’re spending so much extra time on it to the point where they’re not paying attention to their partner at all, this should set alarm bells ringing.

‘Partners who have been cheated on have often said later that they felt “there is clearly something or someone much more important than me.”

“The biggest sign is if they suddenly hide their phone or put a PIN on their phone.

‘For example, last week they left it happily lying around on the table, but now it’s welded to their back pocket.

“Or when they were listening to things or calling people on speaker phone, but now it’s muffled voices.

‘What they do is close their lives layer by layer by layer from their current partner.

‘Things don’t just happen, they are a multi-step process.’

“Partners who have been cheated on have often said later that they felt ‘there is clearly something or someone much more important than me,'” said psychotherapist Bhavna Raithatha.

Suddenly becomes very spicy

Ms Raithatha said cheating partners often exhibit angry and short-tempered behavior as a result of feeling “aloof and distant”.

“I’ve also had a few clients who have challenged their partners on this and they’ve become almost physically aggressive,” she said.

“If they start slamming doors or putting their fists through drywall and becoming threatening, it’s to scare you into staying quiet.

‘They don’t want you to tell family members or friends.

‘If your partner becomes defiant, it is self-protection because he or she does not want to be discovered. It’s their secret. They know there will be consequences.”

Gas lighting

It’s a term that most women are familiar with: gaslighting.

Ms Raithatha said cases often reveal this type of treacherous behavior in the cheater.

They’re simply projecting their guilt onto you, she explained.

“They are the ones who are wrong in this affair, but they blame you. They put you under the microscope.

“They might say things like, ‘Oh, you smell nice, you dress nice, you eat better, why is that?’ Who is that for?’

“And this is devastating. This may make you feel like you are going crazy.

‘They project their insecurities onto you.

‘They will also do that in public, so in the pub or in a restaurant for example, in front of your friends.

‘They want to sow the seed of doubt in front of everyone. They gather a crowd and feed them lies.

“People who are witnesses get that seed of doubt, even if they know you.

“You don’t know what they say about you behind your back and what they then tell their friends.”