My wife and I are childhood sweethearts, but now she slept with my cousin
A MAN has revealed he and his wife were childhood sweethearts, but after making a major change in their relationship he now feels betrayed and gutted.
The 30-year-old admitted that he and his 29-year-old wife had only slept together, so he decided to open up their marriage.
But after they both explored their bisexual fantasies, things quickly went south when the anonymous man’s wife admitted to sleeping with her husband’s cousin.
Not only did she sleep with her husband’s relative, but she wanted to do it again.
Eager to speak out about the situation, the frustrated man took to social media to reveal all.
Posting on Reddit, on the r/relationshipadvice thread under the username @throwRA7642, the man captioned his post “My (30F) wife (29F) slept with my cousin and I don’t know what to do.”
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She then explained, “My wife and I are high school sweethearts and even went to the same college.
“In fact, we have hardly ever been apart during our entire relationship and we have a great relationship.
“We are both bisexual, but have only slept together and had a mutual feeling that we wanted to see what it was like to be with men.
“After a long awkward but productive conversation, we decided to try an open relationship.”
The man revealed that their open relationship had been ‘amazing’, adding: ‘That was a year ago and honestly it’s been great.
“Almost never actually sleep with other women, only guys, and when we do it’s rare and we tell each other about it.
“Not like details, but just who, how and when, so that no suspicious activity takes place.
“We both slept about the same amount, so it’s not like we don’t abuse it. Overall it worked very well.”
What is an open relationship?
An open relationship means that you have more than one sexual partner at the same time.
Both parties in the relationship agree to be non-exclusive and one or both parties engage in sexual activities outside of the relationship.
If one or both parties engage in sexual relations without an agreement, it is considered cheating.
Other names for an open relationship are polyamory and consensual non-monogamy.
However, things quickly changed when his wife started sleeping with his 24-year-old cousin.
He said: “Until a week ago we had a very small get together and I had my siblings and cousins over.
“Well, I just got word from my wife today that she and my cousin slept together the day after the party and they wanted to do it again.
“And that she didn’t tell me the first time because she knew it would cause friction, but if she knew it would cause friction, why would she sleep with him for once? Let alone try again?”
Four warning signs that your partner is cheating
Private investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs that your partner may be cheating.
They start taking their phones everywhere
In close relationships, it is normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones. If their phone habits change, they may be hiding something.
Aaron says, “If your partner starts changing his password, taking his phone everywhere, even around the house, or if he gets defensive when you ask to use his phone, this could be a sign that he’s not being faithful. “
“You should also look at how they put their phone down when not in use. If they look at the phone with the screen facing down, they may be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
If partners cheat, they may avoid you. This could be because they feel guilty or because it is easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner suddenly starts avoiding you and stops wanting to do things with you or stops talking about their day, this is another warning sign.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be difficult, remembering all your lies is impossible, and it’s an easy way to get caught,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a variety of reasons, so it may not be a sure sign of cheating, but Aaron says it can be a warning sign.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but occasionally they may also have more sex at home. This is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will introduce new things into your sex life that were not there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and for them it will feel good. This can cause tension and anxiety within themselves that they will have to justify.
“To release the tension they feel inside, they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and out of nowhere become critical of you. Maybe you didn’t walk the dog that day, do the dishes, or do a book read. Book to your children before bed. A small problem like this can now feel like a big problem and if you experience this, your partner may be cheating,” Aaron warns.
Clearly upset, the man asked: “I never expected this, but is this normal for an open relationship?
“I definitely don’t feel comfortable here, but I’m not sure.”
Reddit users respond
Reddit users were stunned by the woman’s actions and flocked to the comments to share their thoughts on the situation.
One person said: “She knew it would cause friction and she did it anyway before talking to you about it. She broke one of the cardinal rules in an open relationship.
‘You need to talk about it. If you’re not feeling it, set a hard limit.
“I’m not going to say this qualifies as ‘cheating’ because that completely depends on how you feel about it. She knew it would be wrong somehow and she did it anyway.
“That’s just not okay and you need to set simple rules in the future.”
I understand you have an ‘open relationship’, but family is a no-no anyway
Reddit user
Another added: “There is no going back. This was one current move to position itself above you and it worked.
‘You played yourself into a corner because you didn’t at least agree to a firm no in this mess before you started. Now you feel uncomfortable and she is the love dispenser of your family.
“And believe me, she’s not sorry. Your cousin is probably laughing behind your back right now, and soon to your face.”
A third commented: “I would file for divorce.”
While someone else advised: “Divorce. That. Bra. I understand you have an ‘open relationship’, but family is a no-no anyway. Please slap your cousin for me too.”