I thought my wife was cheating with men from bars – dirty emails told the truth
A MAN has revealed his wife had an affair with another woman, leaving him devastated.
The 31-year-old man confessed that things started to change in his relationship after his 29-year-old wife gave birth to their twins.
But what this anonymous father excused as “baby blues” was actually much more shocking.
Eager to speak out about his wife’s infidelity, the man took to social media to share it all, leaving many open-mouthed.
Posting on Reddit, on the r/Marriage thread, the irate father writing under the username @euphoric-Security-86, captioned his post “I just found out my wife is having an affair with another woman.”
The man then explained: ‘I’m really not the type of person to share my problems with others, but I’m so angry right now and I need to vent.
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“Me and my wife Bianca have been together for six years. Our relationship was perfect.
“We share the same interests in sports cars and fitness, we both have well-paying jobs.
“We both admitted that we are each other’s best intimate partner, or so I thought.
“It went pretty quickly for us. Withdrawn [after] dating for four months, engaged [after] dating for seven months and married on our one year anniversary.
But things soon slowed down after his wife gave birth, as he added, “Everything changed when we were ready to try for children.” Bianca had a very difficult pregnancy because she was pregnant with twins. One boy and one girl.
“The children came out too early, but for the most part they were healthy. After the children were born we spent a lot of time with them and after we were allowed to have sex again we tried, but Bianca wasn’t really herself and had difficulty feeling aroused.
“I thought it was just the baby blues. I never insisted on it though, because Bianca doesn’t mind me pleasing myself.
“After three months, Bianca went back to her office job and because she is a mother and a great worker, her boss let her do hybrid remote work.
“A month into my return to work, Bianca kept texting me saying she had to stay extra to catch up on work, and a few weeks later she randomly stopped working remotely.”
Not only this, but the man also realized that his wife was spending a lot more time with her colleague, a woman named Vivian.
He continued: “Bianca started spending a lot of time with her colleague Vivian. I’ve met Vivian before, she was at our baby shower and has been to our house a few times.
“My wife took the Saturdays she had off to go to bars with Vivian. Vivian is single and my wife’s excuse is that she plays wingwoman to Vivian at the bar.
Four warning signs that your partner is cheating
Private investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs that your partner may be cheating.
They start taking their phones everywhere
In close relationships, it is normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones. If their phone habits change, they may be hiding something.
Aaron says, “If your partner starts changing his password, taking his phone everywhere, even around the house, or if he gets defensive when you ask to use his phone, this could be a sign that he’s not being faithful. “
“You should also look at how they put their phone down when not in use. If they look at the phone with the screen facing down, they may be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
If partners cheat, they may avoid you. This could be because they feel guilty or because it is easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner suddenly starts avoiding you and stops wanting to do things with you or stops talking about their day, this is another warning sign.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be difficult, remembering all your lies is impossible, and it’s an easy way to get caught,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a variety of reasons, so it may not be a sure sign of cheating, but Aaron says it can be a warning sign.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but occasionally they may also have more sex at home. This is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will introduce new things into your sex life that were not there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and for them it will feel good. This can cause tension and anxiety within themselves that they will have to justify.
“To release the tension they feel inside, they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and out of nowhere become critical of you. Maybe you didn’t walk the dog that day, do the dishes, or do a book read. Book to your children before bed. A small problem like this can now feel like a big problem and if you experience this, your partner may be cheating,” Aaron warns.
“I started to suspect that she was cheating on me with men she would meet at the bar, but I still had no proof.
“One day I couldn’t hold it back anymore and asked her to see her phone because she was behaving differently and suspected she was cheating. Bianca threw her phone at me and said it was ridiculous to think she was cheating because she loves me and only me.
“I checked everything on her phone and there was no evidence of her cheating.
“I started to think I was the one who was just insecure. Bianca has made it very clear that I look crazy in her eyes.”
But for this father, his proof came when he was away for the weekend with his wife.
He said: “In an attempt to revive things I have planned a weekend away for me and Bianca. I let my brother watch the kids.
“Things were going well until Bianca, an hour and a half away from home, realized she had left her work laptop at home.
“She made a big deal out of it by saying she had something to complete this weekend. I told her not to worry and to focus on us.
The woman I let her take her in, the woman she slept with!
Reddit poster
“When we arrived at our resort, I noticed that I was getting a lot of notifications from my brother.
“My brother texted me saying he was sorry for checking my wife’s email, it was open, but he wanted to know why she wasn’t sleeping with me.
“He sent me pictures of my wife and Vivian’s emails talking about the sex they had a few days ago.
“I told my brother to try logging her email into his phone through Microsoft 365. This way we can follow their conversations.
“I was devastated that Bianca would cheat on me or even lie to me like that. The woman I let her bring into my house she slept with!
The man still spent the weekend with his wife and made sure to hide his emotions.
He wrote: “Since we had already paid for the resort for the weekend, I still had to spend my weekend with her.
‘I tried my best not to let her see that I was upset because I wanted to blow this up in front of her parents.
I plan to visit her parents today to let them know what she has done
Reddit poster
“Bianca even tried to have sex with me, which I denied. Bianca started to realize something was wrong and kept asking me if I was okay, but I told her I just wanted to focus on our vacation.
“After a very quiet drive home on Sunday we arrived home and my brother didn’t even start talking, he barely left a sentence.
“Bianca already started talking about having a busy working day on Monday.”
The man was clearly unsure of what to do and said: ‘I love my wife, but I don’t know if she wants to be with her colleague or with me.
‘I plan to visit her parents today to let them know what she has done. They can take her in until I can get myself together again.”
Reddit users respond
Reddit users were stunned by the man’s confession, with many flocking to the comments to share their thoughts.
While some advised him to divorce, others wanted to warn him not to involve Bianca’s parents.
Talk to her. Leave her family out of it for now
Reddit user
One person said: ‘Don’t involve your wife’s parents in this. This is for you and your wife to resolve.”
Another added: ‘Avoid directly confronting her parents. You already have the evidence; simply hire a divorce lawyer without her knowledge and deliver the papers to her at her workplace.
“If anyone, including her parents, asks, tell the truth that she is having an affair. I understand it may seem intimidating, but it’s not the end of the world. Remember, you are still in your early thirties; concentrate on yourself.”
A third commented: “Now that you have the proof you need to get her talking immediately.”
While someone else recommended: ‘Set things up before confronting someone, even if you’re not sure the marriage is over. Protect yourself first and then make a decision.”
Not only this, but another advised: ‘Talk to her. Leave her family out of it for now.”