‘A new Merc every 3 years, Lauryn Goodman is not Hamilton!?’, fulminates Lizzie Cundy
I thought the WAG war would reach its peak when Wagatha Christie sent shockwaves through the football world.
But the lawsuit between Lauryn Goodman and Kyle Walker has completely overshadowed Coleen and Rebekah – and it’s the talk of the WAG world.
11
11
My jaw dropped when I saw the list of ridiculous demands Lauryn made of Kyle during their child support battle. Yesterday, it all came to light.
Her demands for Kyle ranged from a £70,000 Mercedes, which had to be replaced every three years, to £31,200 worth of artificial grass for the garden of her £2.4million Sussex home, which Kyle had bought for her and their children, Kairo and Kinara.
Who needs a new Mercedes every three years? Who does she think she is, Lewis Hamilton?
Lizzie Cundy
And don’t even get me started on the nanny’s £30,000 car, which needs upgrading every three years and also involves driving lessons.
Honestly, I’ve never wanted to be a babysitter so much!
READ MORE LAURYN GOODMAN NEWS
But let’s be honest: Lauryn’s shopping list is downright absurd.
Even Mariah Carey, JLo and Ivana Trump wouldn’t have asked for such decadence in their heyday.
Yes, Kyle is the father of Lauryn’s children and yes, he is worth £27 million.
But I know billionaires and footballers who are worth much more and who would be shocked by such demands.
Who needs a new Mercedes every three years? Who does she think she is, Lewis Hamilton?
And this was a match she could – and should – have won.
Lizzie Cundy
She wanted £500 a month for her hot tub and £1,440 a month for a cleaner, claiming her house had huge windows and a large glass staircase.
Lauryn, save yourself a few bucks, grab a cloth and some white wine vinegar and you’ll have the job done in no time.
11
LAURYN’S FULL STEP SHOPPING LIST
£30,000 Air Conditioning
£31,200 Astroturf pitch
£20,000 Furniture Fund
£70,000 car allowance every three years
£14,750 per month/£150,000 per year in child support for both children
£3,900 per month childcare costs for Kinara 30 hours per week at £30 per hour
£30,000 Car for the nanny, to be replaced every three years
A custom made baby gate made of wood and glass
A gardener for an hourly rate of £28 – “The lawnmower is heavy”
£171.81 per month for two mobile phones – one for family, one for friends
An iron – “I have a steam iron, but it leaks”
£800 Water Filters
£2,000+ Garden Furniture
£1,499 Garden chairs and table
£6,250 Wardrobes
£2,149 Outdoor Lighting
£9,000 Blinds
£1,619 Oven
£996 Bar Stools
£15,396 banks
£3,925 Sofa Beds
WHAT HE ALREADY PAID FOR
£1,059,717 for his and Lauryn’s legal costs
£2.4million Sussex home for Lauryn
£9,188 per month child support for Kairo
£7,000 per month child support for Kinara
£245,000 Lauryn’s legal costs for the financial hearing regarding Kinara 2024
£48,000 new wardrobes at Lauryn’s home
£52,164 new blinds and curtains
£9,115 CCTV cameras
£5,651 burglar alarm
£30,000 ‘Wishlist’ for Kinara
£27,000 ‘Maternity’ nanny for Kinara
£16,678 to secure the nanny
£5,590 per month for childcare costs
£10,000 property management fund
£75,000 furnishing fund
£28,000 replacement gates for the house
£10,000 Cairo’s Fourth Birthday Party
£73,000 Premium Bonds and an ISA for Cairo
£40,840 To pay off some of Lauryn’s debts
‘An open checkbook’
I have been a Wag myself, but I certainly would not have taken the same path as Lauryn.
I know her and have always liked her, but her actions really did her a disservice.
Kyle clearly feels he has been taken advantage of and the judge in the case clearly agrees. He rejects most of Lauryn’s outrageous demands and criticises her for using the Manchester City defender as ‘an open cheque book’. Ouch.
The problem is that Kyle is clearly in the wrong, as he cheated on his beautiful wife Annie and secretly fathered two children with Lauryn, but Lauryn is the one who has made herself out to be the bad guy.
She’s a good mother. But she did this all wrong.”
Lizzie Cundy
Lauryn is a lovely girl and I, like many others, felt sorry for her when she went to the European Championships, which brought her a lot of criticism. She was determined that her son would see his father play for his country.
She’s a good mother. But she’s done this all wrong.
11
11
“She made Kyle look like a hero”
Instead of emerging with more sympathy and an army of despised women at her side, she has instead portrayed Kyle as a hero.
Lauryn reportedly earns no more than £1,200 a month of her own money, from blogs and social media posts, and is worth £10,000.
Lauryn immediately ruled herself out and it’s never a good idea to be the Yoko Ono of the football world.
Lizzie Cundy
However, I don’t think she had a hidden agenda to get as much money out of Kyle as possible, or to trap him for financial gain.
I know Lauryn was very much in love with Kyle and truly believed he would leave Annie and their four sons for her.
And when that didn’t happen, things changed.
11
Bitterness and revenge
Perhaps she did this out of bitterness and revenge for what he had done to her.
But Lauryn should have been smarter and played the long game. That’s what I would have done if I were in her shoes.
Yes, it would have hurt me – believe me, footballers are difficult, I know – but I would have taken a step back, not gone to the European Championship, not demanded exorbitant amounts of money and not hurt everyone.
If Lauryn had asked less of Kyle instead of special glass-coated stair gates and a £33,000 air conditioning system, and if she had maintained a dignified silence instead of doing revealing interviews and trying to get a reality show off, they might have had a friendlier relationship.
And if she had done that, she would have come out a lot better off and made more profit in the long run.
My experience is that the best revenge comes from your own success and happiness.
11
11
“I can’t help but feel sorry for her”
On the other hand, Annie, Kyle’s long-suffering wife, has remained graceful and cool throughout the ordeal, which must have been incredibly embarrassing and traumatic for her.
She is clearly a very private woman who has kept her mouth shut the whole time. I am sure she will be furious behind closed doors.
I can’t help but feel sorry for her. And I can understand why the other WAGs avoided Lauryn at the EC.
No matter how much money you have, no one likes to be made fun of. And there’s no doubt that Kyle felt like Lauryn did.
Lizzie Cundy
Here she comes with the cameras and the KW chain. That will undoubtedly anger the other footballers, their wives and partners, many of whom are good friends of Annie.
Lauryn immediately ruled herself out and it’s never a good idea to be the Yoko Ono of the football world.
Speaking of the football world, this lawsuit is really the talk of the town at the moment and everyone I’ve spoken to is stunned by Lauryn’s own goal.
11
“This was a match she should have won”
I’m sure many jokers, including myself, had sympathy for her when this all started, but that’s all in the past now and all people talk about is how ridiculous her demands are.
And let’s face it, no matter how much money you have, no one likes to be made fun of. And there’s no doubt that Kyle felt like Lauryn did.
I think he comes across as a reasonable man, who has been very generous with what he has paid for so far, including the house, an £8,000 holiday to Mexico for her and £110,000 in maintenance for their son, which Lauryn wanted to increase to £177,000.
She tried to get one of the best players in our country (in football) to play, but she didn’t do a good job.
And this was a match she could – and should – have won.
11
11
