I was juggling planning the wedding for the man of my dreams with two boyfriends
A WOMAN has revealed how she was busy planning her wedding while simultaneously pursuing three serious relationships.
Tiffany Banks, 37, and her newlywed husband, Joseph Banks, 35, from Ohio, had a beautiful wedding last September in front of friends and family.
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Tiffany’s boyfriends, Allen Mallory, 33, and Andy Fitch, 52, who she dates separately and has other partners of her own, gave their full support.
While Joseph’s other partner was also invited that day.
Now, Tiffany has proven that love truly does conquer all, and speaks exclusively to Fabulous in hopes of raising awareness about polyamory.
Tiffany, an anti-money laundering analyst, says: “I believe humans are designed to develop and manage multiple relationships.
“Our love story is proof of how incredible polyamory can be. I didn’t know who I was for so long and now I do.
“If you can be anything in life, be your true self.”
Over the years, Tiffany felt trapped in monogamous relationships and always felt different from everyone else.
She says, “Although I’ve been in monogamous relationships for over a decade, I’ve always hated being ‘everything’ to someone.
“I couldn’t shake the feeling and worried if I was weird. I liked having a partner nearby, but I didn’t want to be completely enmeshed in their lives.
“I wanted my own identity and goals and constantly felt limited.”
When Tiffany was 28 in 2015, she discovered that her closest relatives had opened their marriage.
She was stunned because the couple had always been someone she looked up to and aspired to.
Tiffany says, “I heard the words ‘open marriage’ and ‘polyamorous’ for the first time in my life; I was stunned.
“This started a snowball effect and I went down a rabbit hole reading books about it.
“Suddenly it was like all the pieces of my puzzle were completed.
“After a while, I gathered the courage to join some online groups for support. I slowly started meeting people online who were also poly.
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“The next year I started dating multiple people at the same time. After 31 years, I felt like my true, authentic self.”
On Tiffany’s Facebook, she posted loud and clear about polyamory. A year later, in 2019, it caught the attention of an old school friend of hers, Joseph, an army soldier.
Tiffany says: “Joe lived in my hometown and we hadn’t seen each other since we were 16.
“Over the years I had seen that he was in the military. After he liked more than 10 posts specifically about polyamory, I slid into his inbox.
“Joe told me how he had been swinging for ten years before he became polyamorous.
“He lived his truth, just like me. The next year we chatted online while seeing several people.
“The next year we finally had lunch and had undeniable chemistry.
“I had just started a relationship with someone else and also had a partner. While Joe had ended things with his main partner and was seeing other people.
What is polyamory?
Polyamory is the practice of having romantic relationships with more than one person at a time, with the knowledge and consent of all parties.
It can refer to relationships where one person has multiple partners or spouses, or where all parties are in a relationship with each other, for example in a group.
According to You governor6.8% of people in Britain have been in a polyamorous relationship.
Months later, Tiffany and Joseph started dating, before eventually falling in love.
After finding happiness with Joseph, Tiffany reconnected with software architect Andy, a man she had briefly spoken to online through a polyamorous Facebook group.
Tiffany says, “Joseph had such a good heart. He was compassionate and made me laugh.
“After thinking for a while that we were just having sex, we finally gave in to our feelings and really got into it.
“While Andy and I also became more serious. Andy was married and his wife supported him.
“He lived 3,000 miles away, but I loved talking to him. He was intellectual and stimulated me in a different way than what Joe did.”
Tiffany started a long-distance relationship with Andy and started face-timing every day.
That year she and Joseph also grew stronger and met each other’s families.
With both relationships flourishing, she met college professor Allen on Tinder the following year in 2021.
Allen had a long-term partner, Morgan Hitchcock, 35, a designer, with whom he lived, and they were also polyamorous.
Tiffany says: “Just months after becoming a couple with Allen, Joe proposed to me during a surprise comedy PowerPoint skit.
“I was so happy. But after our engagement news broke, some older family members became confused.
“They asked us if we were no longer polyamorous. I told them we still were and nothing changed.
“After that, as I started planning our big day, I continued to juggle my other relationships. I still made them a priority too.
“Andy and I haven’t gone a day without talking. And after Joe and I moved in together, Andy and Joe met on Facetime.
“They loved each other and became friends.
“Soon Joe started going out for dinner and drinks once a month with my other partner Allen. They called it their ‘bro dates’
“Then I also became good friends with Allen’s partner, Morgan. And Joe also saw his own partners.
“It was absolutely beautiful, and our partners couldn’t be happier that we were getting married.
“As the wedding got closer, my other sexual partners had fallen out over time.”
With so much going on, Tiffany and Joe started sharing their Google calendars with their various partners to let others know if they were available.
In October last year, Tiffany and Joseph’s big day arrived and they got married in the presence of family and friends.
Tiffany says, “Because it was a special occasion, Joe and I agreed not to sleep with anyone else that night because it was our wedding night.
“I walked down the aisle to Joe and felt like the happiest woman.
“Because Andy was far away, unfortunately he couldn’t come. But Allen and Morgan came by, congratulated us and joined in the celebration.
“I made sure to keep the PDA low with Allen because I didn’t want to shock our older relatives.
“After the reception, Allen and Morgan went back to mine and Joe’s house for more drinks. We had a great time.
‘Now Joe and I have settled into married life, and we couldn’t be happier. Allen and Andy are also doing great.
“Joe and I now have a podcast, Melan8ted Podcast, where we discuss all things married, poly life.
“I hope our love story is proof of how amazing polyamory really is.”
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