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I’m furious with my fiancé because she used my toothbrush – it’s gross

HOW close is too close to be with your significant other?

For this guy, it’s sharing a toothbrush with his fiancée, but she doesn’t mind at all – so where do you draw the line?

Close up of a woman putting toothpaste on a toothbrush

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Close up of a woman putting toothpaste on a toothbrushCredit: Getty
The man discovered that his bride-to-be had used his toothbrush

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The man discovered that his bride-to-be had used his toothbrushCredit: Getty

Going to Reddit, the anonymously The man asked if people thought he was overreacting because he was so disgusted by her bride-to-be’s use of his toothbrush.

“I really want to know what everyone else thinks about this,” he wrote.

“After brushing my teeth today, I was flossing and my fiance came into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

“She picked up my toothbrush and started brushing away. I let her know, ‘Hey, that’s my toothbrush,’ and she put it down, looked at me, shrugged, picked it back up and continued brushing.”

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He then told her that he thought it was “really gross” to share a toothbrush, but she didn’t get the hint and kept using it.

“I’m really devastated at the moment and I ask her if she can just use her toothbrush which literally fits next where mine was, she doesn’t listen and moves on,” he added.

Things then went from bad to worse when she hit him back for being ‘overdramatic’ about the whole thing.

Not wanting to cause a bigger argument, the guy had no choice but to “frantically clean” his toothbrush before using it himself.

The incident left him with a bad taste in his mouth, so he decided to confront his fiancée to see if she had ever used his toothbrush before.

To his shock, she admitted that she had been using it “for a while.”

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“I’m crazy, like I need a new toothbrush. I think it’s strange that she didn’t listen when I said stop.

“But what’s even crazier is that I’ve had a conversation with her before about how I just think it’s gross and that I wouldn’t like to find out that she’s been doing it for a while.

“I have no idea why or what the point is. We’ve been arguing about it all night now,” he said.

After he shared his issue on Reddit’s Am I Overreacting forum, people were quick to defend his response.

One said: “Don’t overreact. There is a difference between even intense kissing and what a toothbrush does; even the healthiest gums will sometimes bleed when someone is brushing.

“The bigger problem here is that you’ve already talked to her about it in the past. Even worse, she ignored you when you asked her to stop.

“If she can’t respect this very simple boundary while you’re engaged, will she respect other boundaries when you get married, or will she continue to ignore, disrespect, and belittle you?”

A second who agreed to share a toothbrush was a step too far, the woman said: “This is super gross! You also set a small, simple boundary for her not to use your toothbrush.

“I think it’s normal to want someone not to use your toothbrush, it’s so gross!”

Meanwhile, a third had a different idea about how to tackle the problem: “Just tell her you use this to clean the corners of the shower or toilet.”

“You need a secret toothbrush in your sock drawer for your use and a decoy in the bathroom for her,” another suggested.

Should you ever share a toothbrush?

Sharing is not actually caring, at least according to Dr. Ben AtkinsDentist and trustee of the Oral Health Foundation.

“Sharing a toothbrush leaves you open to all kinds of oral and general health problems,” he explained.

“Just because you kiss a partner or occasionally share a fork or spoon during a meal does not justify using their toothbrush.

“This is because brushing sometimes causes the gums to bleed, exposing anyone you share your toothbrush with to bloodstream diseases.

“This means that by sharing a toothbrush you can also share blood, which is a lot riskier than just exchanging saliva.”

Tips to help children brush their teeth

Dr. Khaled Kasem, head orthodontist of Europe’s largest orthodontics chain Impressiontells Sun readers how to get their children to brush their own teeth.

1. Find a time that works for you

“Children need consistency to learn, so make sure you establish a routine,” explains Dr. Kasem.

“Whether it’s right after breakfast or bath time or just before you put them to bed, make brushing part of their regular schedule so they can get used to it.”

2. Keep it in the bathroom

“Try to get into the habit of brushing in the bathroom, and make sure you do the same,” he said.

    “Children often model adult behavior and if they see you brushing your teeth somewhere else, chances are they will want to do the same.”

    It’s also a good idea to brush your teeth at the same time, as this can get your child into the mood for it.

    3. Take your time and let them learn

    Dr. Eyrumlu said it’s important to let children discover how to hold the toothbrush themselves.

    “It’s difficult to position the brush at the right angle to reach each tooth. You want the brush at a 45-degree angle to the teeth,” he said.

    By dividing the mouth into four parts, children can do well. The top half on the left, the top half on the right, the bottom half on the left and the bottom half on the right.

    4. Add an element of fun

    “Try to make brushing teeth a fun activity rather than a chore, and get them excited,” says Dr. Kasem.

      “Whether you make up a song or give each tooth a funny name as you brush it, keeping them engaged creates excitement about the whole thing.”

      The toothbrush song Hey Dugee is a good example of this, as it encourages children to brush their teeth for a full two minutes – the recommended time.

      Another option is to use your child’s favorite toys.

      “Have them ‘brush’ the teeth of the toy (without toothpaste),” Dr. Kasem suggested.

      “This will help them understand that it is a normal part of everyone’s routine, and not just a punishment for them.

      5. Use time

      It is important to brush for two full minutes, which is 30 seconds for every fifteen minutes of the mouth.

        Dr. Eyrumlu suggests using a timer so children can see or hear for themselves what time it is.

        “Encourage them to brush a quarter of the mouth, and when the timer goes off, they can move on to the next section,” he explained.

        “Brush along, brush your own teeth at the same time and enjoy the song.

        “You can also try using a mirror so your child can see what he is doing.”

        6. Give compliments

        Don’t forget to inspect your child’s mouth when he/she is done to make sure he/she did it right.

          “Then give lots of praise, high fives, whatever works,” Dr. Eyrumlu said.

          “Involve the whole family in this experience if you can! The point is to make the routine a fun experience that they enjoy.”

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