A mum who snubbed her fiancé on their wedding day has said it was the 'best decision' she ever made – even though she was 'terrified' that everyone would hate her.
Alexis Saya was due to marry her ex-partner on April 16, 2023 in Huntington, Indiana, US, but made the 'difficult' choice to leave on the morning of their big day.
The couple first met in high school and share a four-year-old child together.
They had been on and off for years, with Alexis staying in the relationship despite knowing she “wasn't happy.”
Even though she had no job and was at risk of becoming a single mother, the 23-year-old woke up at her wedding and just 'knew' she had to cancel the celebrations her mother had paid £32,800 for.
Alexis described how on the morning of the wedding, while still in bed, she turned to her partner and said: 'We can't get married today' – before leaving him shortly afterwards.
On TikTok, the student nurse shared a photo from her wedding day, compared to a current photo, which has since gone viral with 144,100 views.
One photo shows a tearful Alexis and is captioned “the day I left my fiance on our wedding day.”
Alexis Saya (pictured) was supposed to marry her fiancé on April 16, 2023, but made the 'difficult' choice to call off the wedding on the morning of their big day
In the next image, you can see her beaming at the camera with the caption, “It's been 16 months now.”
Many TikTokers responded to the comments, praising the mother for her “brave” decision, while others wondered, “Why the wedding day?”
Alexis wants to encourage others to leave a relationship if they are 'questioning' it and insists she 'can't wait to get married one day' to the right person.
The mother, who lives in Fort Wayne, Indiana, US, said: 'I don't think I've ever really done anything more difficult.
“It felt like it was a decision I had just made, but I had almost no say in it. I had no control over it.
“It was about six in the morning. I said, “I'm sorry, we can't get married today.” He looked at me a little and went back to sleep.
Alexis, a student nurse, took to TikTok to explain her decision to leave her fiancé on the morning of their £32,800 wedding celebration
Alexis (pictured with her daughter) said she will always be grateful to her ex-partner for their daughter Avielle
'I went into another room and called my mother. My sister was on the phone with another family telling them I wouldn't go through with it.
“I wanted him to go get our daughter so I could leave because I didn't really want to be there when everyone woke up and realized I wasn't getting married.
'I woke him up again and said, 'I want you to go get her.' He was very confused and I said, “We're not getting married today.”
'He looked at me and said, 'What are you talking about?' And I said, “Do you really think this is a marriage?” He went to get her and I left.
'I didn't want to, but I knew I had to. I cried that whole day. It was terrible. I found it harder than he did. You give up everything you've known.
'I was a stay-at-home mom at the time, so I had nothing. I had no job, I had no money of my own. Everything was his.”
Alexis took daughter Avielle straight to her mother's house before moving back into her old apartment.
While she found herself in a “bad situation” after the wedding, she now believes it was the “best decision” she ever made.
The 23-year-old mother of one posted two photos to TikTok (pictured) months after calling off the wedding. The first photo (left) showed a tearful Alexis on the day she left her partner, while the second (right) showed her at 16 months and looking happier than ever
Alexis said, “Right after I wished I had gone through with it. I remember thinking, it was about 3 p.m., “I should be married by now.” I ended up in a very bad palace after the wedding.
'I just couldn't believe I had actually made this decision. I probably regretted it for a while. Then it got to the point where I was really happy I did it.
'I knew I wasn't happy in the relationship and I knew it. I always tried to make myself believe that it was because I loved him.
“It's something that I will always have with me and it's a trauma that I think I'll always carry with me, but I've found a way to cope and deal with it better.
“But I think it was definitely the best decision for me and my daughter.
'[My daughter] was probably the biggest reason I left. It got to the point where if I couldn't do it for her, it just wasn't fair.
“This is her only childhood and I am in charge of it. That's the best decision I've ever made, even though it's hard to accept.
“Every time I see him it reminds me why I left. I always wonder sometimes when it's late at night and I'm lying in bed and lonely and I think, “Oh, I wish I just had my family back.”
Alexis admitted that she was in a relationship for years, even though she knew it wasn't right
Alexis revealed that the couple was on and off between 2019 and 2023 and things changed when they started planning the wedding, but she will always be “grateful” for their daughter.
“I just think about the good times and then I see him again and it just reminds me of all the bad that outweighs all the good. And that's why I left.'
The couple first met when they were just 16 years old and got engaged in 2020 after having their first child together.
She said: 'The relationship was not a good relationship. We were young, we were stupid.
“We purposely had a baby, young, that I would never regret. He gave me the best thing ever in my life. I am eternally grateful to him for that.
'After my daughter was born, we broke up a few times and got back together a few times.
“I think I had three or four rings total, because of how many times we'd broken up.
“We finally started planning the wedding in 2022. It would be a beautiful wedding. I was very excited. I think things have changed a bit for me.”
Many TikTokers shared their support for Alexis and her “brave” decision. However, others wondered why she waited until the morning of the wedding to call it off
Alexis' mum paid for her £32,800 wedding, including the venue (pictured), leaving her 'terrified' everyone would hate her if she canceled it
Alexis admitted she never intended to end the relationship on her wedding day and feared the “terrifying” decision would make everyone “hate” her.
Alexis said, “When you make decisions like that, you think everyone is going to hate you. That's how I felt. I thought I was going to lose my mother because she paid for the wedding. I was terrified.
“I feel like people think just because I say I left on my wedding day,” she just doesn't care or be able to do anything.” It was terrifying, really. It was very difficult.
'Even my own family said, 'Why did you wait?' I actually went to bed that night thinking I was going to wake up and get married.
'You only see a fragment of the situation. I think it's all situational.
'I would never have chosen it that way. I never did anything malicious to him. I never wanted to hurt him.
“We had spoken on the phone that day after I left. Maybe 4pm. I just cried, “I didn't want to do this to hurt you. I just couldn't do it.”
The mother encourages others to leave the relationship if they have doubts and “can't wait” to get married in the future.
Alexis said, “I would tell anyone if you even have the question of whether you should leave, you should.
“And maybe you'll go back, or maybe you won't, and it might be the best decision you ever made.
'The hardest part is leaving. I still can't believe I did it.
“There are still times when it's hard, but I have to remind myself that I will find someone who loves me and my daughter. I can't wait to get married one day. I can't wait to have more children.'
Many users praised Alexis in the comments. One TikToker said: 'You are so brave. So people wouldn't do this even if they felt it.”
Another said: 'Congratulations on putting yourself first.'
A third said: 'That must have been so hard.'
Still other social media users criticized Alexis for waiting until the wedding day.
One said: 'Why the wedding day?'
Another wondered: 'Why do people always wait for the wedding day. That's so scary.'
