A few whose 17-year-old son suddenly died during a school sports competition, spoke a year after his death and gave their advice about dealing with and discussing grief.
Raphael Pryor collapsed on the Green at Eton College while playing Field Game, a rugby football hybrid unique for the school.
Raphael's father Michael Pryor saw him fall and resuscitation was immediately performed before the teenager was taken to the Wexham Park Hospital and was kept alive until his mother arrived.
Sabine Vandenbroucke hurried to the hospital bed of her son and Raphael was declared dead at 10.30 pm on March 16, 2024, with the cause of death as sudden death syndrome for adults (SADs).
SADS is given as a cause of death after a cardiac arrest that cannot be explained by a post-mortem examination because the structure of the heart seems normal.
A year after her son's death, Mrs. Vandenbroucke told the Sunday Times: “We feel the sadness so visceral because we loved him so much.
'We don't want to get rid of the grief because the downside would be that we get rid of love. I have never loved anyone as he and I will never again. '
Mrs. Vandenbroucke, 53, says social events where she would mention her son for the discomfort of fellow guests, although she wants to discuss Raphael and says, “He is and will always be my favorite subject.”
Raphael Pryor died on March 16, 2024, while playing a sports match at Eton College
Eton College in Eton, Windsor, Berkshire
The Eton Old Boys Field Game (File Image)
The company director born in Belgium explained how she wants to discuss her grief and said that people do not hesitate to talk to the relatives about the loss of their loved ones.
“It is unlikely that you can make it even worse because of what you say,” Mr. Pryor, 55, added a real estate lawyer and Eton Alumnus who had played an alumni match on a field nearby shortly before his son's death.
The couple remembered how the most helpful of their friends brought dishes of food without asking in the weeks after Raphael died.
For those who are not sure of how they can comfort mourning lovers, sending flowers will be appreciated as just as they send immediately.
Immediately after death, the house is flooded with flowers to let them all die together, they said.
And vague sentences such as “I'm sorry for your loss,” say the couple, can be switched for specific language, instead refer to “Raphael's death.”
Mr. Pryor and Mrs. Vandenbroucke praised the school friends of Raphael who spoke with confidence and directly with them when offering their condolences at an Eton Reflection Service four days after he died.
They found hope in their son's generation, they said, whose empathy and the ability to look inside is unparalleled.
A year after the death of their son, the parents took the therapy, traveled to the favorite places of Raphael, took care of cherishing and remembering their most precious moments with him and did not remove the grieving process.
The last photo of Raphael, taken on the day he died
Raphael's father, Michael Pryor, a real estate lawyer and Eton College Alumnus
Company director Sabine Vandenbroucke, Raphael's mother
Raphael was 17 and in his last school year when he died
Raphael's parents remember him as an avid sportsman with a love for skiing and cycling
In his last school year when he died, Raphael would have been A-levels in mathematics, history and French.
He was an avid sportsman with a love for skiing, football, cycling and fishing.
And Mrs. Vandenbroucke continues to work, run and visit places where her son was loved, such as local restaurants and the Belgian coast, in the conviction that she will see him again one day.
Raphael's parents do not like the sudden death syndrome for adults, because it makes his death sound like a 'state', while they really feel at ease with the fact that doctors could not give an explanation for his death.
Still awaiting the coroner's research, they are supported by the charity sudden inexplicable death in childhood and 'unexplained' feel better the circumstances of Raphael.
Mr. Pryor and Mrs. Vandenbroucke have made peace with the fact that their grief will never decrease. It can't even reduce. It just becomes more manageable.
And they find comfort in remembering their son as lively, energetic, friendly and comfortable in his own skin.
