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Home Australia Is Ben Affleck now Hollywood’s most ineligible bachelor? The damning verdict of his exes on ‘grumpy’ chain-smoking star who’s ‘not a lot of laughs’ – after his ‘sad face’ became an internet phenomenon

Is Ben Affleck now Hollywood’s most ineligible bachelor? The damning verdict of his exes on ‘grumpy’ chain-smoking star who’s ‘not a lot of laughs’ – after his ‘sad face’ became an internet phenomenon

by Jeffrey Beilley
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Giving off an aura of being weighed down by life, while skulking around in checked shirts and navy jumpers and chain smoking, made him the poster boy for middle aged men everywhere experiencing a crushing sense of ennui. 

Indeed ‘sad Ben Affleck’ became such a cultural moment, it’s sparked countless memes and even an essay in the New Yorker dissecting the phenomenon. 

However, it’s one thing to be cursed with a ‘resting hard face’ as Ben himself has put it, and quite another when rumours emerge of a matching demeanour behind it. 

A source recently told Dailymail.com that the actor’s ‘grumpy and negative’ nature played a large part in his marital woes with Jennifer Lopez – who he’s split from after two years of marriage. 

The damning verdict was that Ben, 52, whose preferred activities in life away from the film studio and his family are smoking and eating Dunkin Donuts, is ‘not a lot of laughs’.  

Added this was his ex-wife Jennifer Garner’s confirmation that he’s a complicated person to live with who can be ‘cold’ and ‘casts quite a shadow’, giving weight to the idea that his grumpy public persona is more than just a mask. 

Ben Affleck's aura of being weighed down by life has seen him become the poster boy for despair

Ben Affleck’s aura of being weighed down by life has seen him become the poster boy for despair 

Caught on camera! Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck got people talking once again after an eyebrow-raising clip captured the couple sharing an awkward moment at the 2023 Grammy awards

Caught on camera! Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck got people talking once again after an eyebrow-raising clip captured the couple sharing an awkward moment at the 2023 Grammy awards

Even if sniping about negative behaviour can be put down to post-divorce bitterness, there’s no denying that Affleck has put those close to him through some difficult times while battling addiction. 

He’s had three stints in rehab in 2001, 2017 and 2018, with his Garner staging an intervention on the most recent occasion and driving him to treatment. 

He later embarassed the Alias actress by saying that he felt trapped in the marriage while trying to stay together for the sake of their children, and would cope by drinking a bottle of Scotch and falling asleep on the couch. 

After facing a backlash, he later clarified that he was in no way blaming her for his alcoholism.

However, the unflattering revelations that have emerged from two high profile divorces, coupled with the irony of someone who has money, fame and a supportive family giving off such a sense of exhausted resignation all the time, may give potential future partners pause for thought.  

He may have a glittering career with acclaimed roles and bulging awards cabinet to match, but away from the camera, Affleck may well have earned himself the unwelcome title of Hollywood’s most ineligible bachelor.

‘Grumpy and negative’ behaviour  

Affleck’s demeanor was cited as a reason for his split from Jennifer, with sources claiming she grew tired of his mood.

‘Jenny has had enough and she really tried but she can do no more, it’s not getting any better, it’s worse,’ a music industry source told DailyMail.com last month. 

The insider add that the main reason J.Lo, 54, left her 51-year-old husband was because he was always ‘grumpy and negative’ like Oscar The Grouch from Sesame Street.

Lopez was also said to be ‘shocked’ by the bad press she was getting, which she believes is not fair. 

‘If people could see what she has really gone through they would be easier on her.

While talking to Kevin Hart for an episode from season four of his show Hart To Heart , the Oscar-winning actor addressed the 'Sad Affleck' memes - Seen with JLo in 2022

While talking to Kevin Hart for an episode from season four of his show Hart To Heart , the Oscar-winning actor addressed the ‘Sad Affleck’ memes – Seen with JLo in 2022

Affleck looks furious, as Lopez tries to keep her calm in the clip filmed at the Grammys

The cameras accidentally caught J.Lo in what appeared to be marital spat with Affleck, though her facial expression conveyed playfulness 

Ben said: 'I'm also a little bit shy. I don't like a lot of attention. This is why people see me and they're like, "Why is this dude always mad?; in February 2023

Ben said: ‘I’m also a little bit shy. I don’t like a lot of attention. This is why people see me and they’re like, “Why is this dude always mad?; in February 2023

‘Ben is a great guy but he can be grumpy and a downer … if they saw how it really was, they would not attack her.’

The source added: ‘He chain smokes and cusses and seems irritated a lot of the time. Great director and actor, but not a lot of laughs with him, you know? He is a wonderful father though.’

Sources previously pointed to the pressure of Ben’s career as one of the reasons behind his unpredictable mood.

‘He is now filming The Accountant 2 and the hours are really long, he is working hard at it and it’s a lot to juggle with marriage and kids,’ said the source. ‘So sometimes he is not in the best mood.’ 

One of the first signs of trouble in paradise with Lopez was their appearance at the Grammy Awards in February 2023, less than a year after they tied the knot in a fairytale ceremony.

During the event, the pair were joined by host Trevor Noah at his table, who briefly sat next to them.

Juggling a drink from his beloved Dunkin Donuts with several parcels, Ben's ubiquity as a meme became his calling card

Juggling a drink from his beloved Dunkin Donuts with several parcels, Ben’s ubiquity as a meme became his calling card 

The cameras accidentally caught J.Lo in what appeared to be marital spat with Affleck, though her facial expression conveyed playfulness.

Fans speculated that she was scolding the Armageddon star for his blatant lack of interest in the ceremony.

A lip reader commissioned by DailyMail.com recently revealed what the two had actually said to one another.

‘Stop,’ Lopez told him. ‘Look more friendly. Look motivated.’ Affleck replied: ‘I might.’

But that ‘might’ turned out to be a no because Affleck continued to look totally disinterested beside Lopez.

‘Why does Ben Affleck always look like he’s 10 minutes away from crying during a much-needed smoke break?’ one fan wrote. 

Others rushed to his defence and put the blame on Lopez for pushing Ben into the limelight, which he does not enjoy.

In May 2023, Ben shocked fans when he was seen opening the car door for Jennifer, but then roughly slamming it behind her

In May 2023, Ben shocked fans when he was seen opening the car door for Jennifer, but then roughly slamming it behind her

And in a bid to quash any rumours of marital strife, the pair responded by getting matching tattoos just days later. 

It was not an isolated incident, though, and in May of 2023, Ben appeared to suffer another very public moment of irritation while returning to their car after being out and about with his wife in Los Angeles.

First, he opened Jennifer’s passenger door for her in a seemingly chivalrous display.

But then the stone-faced Ben — who fans thought looked ‘stressed’ in the moment — let his arm fly and slammed the door shut behind his wife.

Shortly after the dramatic door slam, Ben and Jennifer both raised eyebrows when they were seen attending the premiere of Jennifer’s film The Mother in Los Angeles.

In an awkward moment while posing on the red carpet, Jennifer could be seen frowning and gesticulating at her husband, who looked angry.

After they were snapped having their apparently tense conversation, they soon reverted to Hollywood mode with beaming grins and stage-worthy kisses.

A lipreader determined that Jennifer asked Ben if her low-cut top was ‘showing too much, leading him to respond that it looked fine.

Public rows aside, perhaps a large part of the problem was a mismatch between Lopez’s brand of glitzy stardrom, and Ben’s beaten-down dad persona. 

Late in 2023, Ben appeared to develop a penchant for McDonald’s, which wasn’t necessarily a surprise for the avowed Dunkin’ fan.

Dunkin Donuts has finally unveiled their full Super Bowl ad featuring Ben Affleck trying to start his pop music career in a rather hilarious fashion

Dunkin Donuts has finally unveiled their full Super Bowl ad featuring Ben Affleck trying to start his pop music career in a rather hilarious fashion

The pop star famously maintains an extraordinarily strict diet built around fresh foods and a lack of processed items — aside from protein powder for her daily shakes.

Yet she was pictured in the passenger seat multiple times as Ben drove through the McDonald’s drive-through in October, November and December of 2023.

The Town star was even seen going there as many as four times in two weeks in October.

Jennifer often looked stony-faced, or even outright annoyed, as she sat next to her husband, yet she was game enough to appear in a Dunkin Donuts commercial with her husband, Matt Damon and Tom Brady at this year’s superbowl. 

All good fun, of course, but playing into the idea that fried sugar is the real love of his life certainly hasn’t helped to dispel the public perception of Affleck as a beaten- down husband who just wants to be left alone to indulge in fast food. 

‘Sad Affleck’ memes

Back in 2016, Ben sparked an accidental social media frenzy while filming a press junket for the new DC blockbuster Batman vs Superman: Dawn Of Justice

Back in 2016, Ben sparked an accidental social media frenzy while filming a press junket for the new DC blockbuster Batman vs Superman: Dawn Of Justice

While recording an interview with Henry Cavill , a shot of Ben appearing visibly downcast went viral on social media, when it featured in a YouTube video titled Sad Affleck

While recording an interview with Henry Cavill , a shot of Ben appearing visibly downcast went viral on social media, when it featured in a YouTube video titled Sad Affleck

Ben Affleck seems to be the most miserable man in Hollywood as he is often seen looking downcast when out in Los Angeles and appearing irritated at red carpet events. Seen in a new episode of Hart To Heart

Ben Affleck seems to be the most miserable man in Hollywood as he is often seen looking downcast when out in Los Angeles and appearing irritated at red carpet events. Seen in a new episode of Hart To Heart

Back in 2016, Ben sparked an accidental social media frenzy while filming a press junket for the new DC blockbuster Batman vs Superman: Dawn Of Justice.

While recording an interview with Henry Cavill, a shot of Ben appearing visibly downcast went viral on social media, when it featured in a YouTube video titled Sad Affleck.

The six-year-old video – featuring a melancholy soundtrack – shows Ben alongside co-star Henry Cavill as they are told that the movie is getting mixed reviews.

And while Cavill launches into a professional response, Affleck turns his gaze down with a look of utter dismay.

The video – which went viral overnight – was quickly turned into a parody, as YouTuber Sabconth added in a collage of negative headlines from review articles, as well as Simon and Garfunkel’s song The Sound of Silence.

The actor reflected on the wild social media reaction to the meme during an interview with the LA Times in 2022.

He said: ‘I got to a place where [the public perception] was so different from who I am that I just stopped reading and stopped caring.

‘But then, as my kids got older and started seeing the internet themselves, that’s the difficult part. Even the ‘Sad Affleck’ meme – that was funny to me. I mean, there’s nobody who hasn’t felt that way at a junket.’

‘But then my kids see it and I think, ‘Oh, are they going to think their dad is fundamentally sad or they have to worry about me?’ That’s really tough.’

For many social media superfans, Ben’s expressions have become a permenant fixture of memes culture, regularly used to emulate feelings of melancholy, disdain or downright annoyance.

In February 2023, Ben found himself as a meme once again, when a clip of himself looking noticeably disinterested at The Grammy Awards went viral

In February 2023, Ben found himself as a meme once again, when a clip of himself looking noticeably disinterested at The Grammy Awards went viral 

The face that sparked countless memes! Sad Ben Affleck smoking became an internet sensation

The face that sparked countless memes! Sad Ben Affleck smoking became an internet sensation 

Whether it be behind the wheel of his car, with eyes shut in somewhat defeat, or smoking a cigarette on the street, Ben’s reactions have regularly become the images of burdens and exhaustion. 

His meme-fication continued in 2019 when snaps of a visibly-glum Ben staring out to sea in Honolulu, during a break from filming the Netflix action movie Triple Frontier. 

In the snaps, Ben showed off an enormous phoenix back tattoo, as he stood solo, looking into the distance, sparked yet another sea of memes and social media reaction.

The images were even discussed in a piece for The New Yorker, when writer Naomi Fry penned: ‘The image suggests not just the fall of Affleck but the coming fall of man. There is something about this exhausted father that reflexively induces panic.

‘We’ve been living in a world run by Afflecks for so long, will we even know ourselves when they’re gone?

‘He can cast quite a shadow’ 

Ben's ex-wife Jennifer Garner previously shed light on how his 'complicated' nature had an impact on their marriage, branding him 'cold' in a 2016 interview

Ben’s ex-wife Jennifer Garner previously shed light on how his ‘complicated’ nature had an impact on their marriage, branding him ‘cold’ in a 2016 interview

In 2018, the star was pictured being driven back to a treatment facility by his ex-wife Jennifer Garner, for what would be his third stint in rehab

In 2018, the star was pictured being driven back to a treatment facility by his ex-wife Jennifer Garner, for what would be his third stint in rehab 

While much has been made of Ben’s mood in the wake of news that his second marriage is over, Ben’s ex-wife Jennifer Garner has previously shed light on how his ‘complicated’ nature had an impact on their relationship.

In a 2016 interview with Vanity Fair, Jennifer discussed her divorce from Ben for the first time, saying that she did not regret her choice to marry him and would do it again. 

‘You can’t have these three babies and so much of what we had. He’s the love of my life. What am I going to do about that? He’s the most brilliant person in any room, the most charismatic, the most generous,’ she said. 

However, she qualified her statement with an insight into his character that went a long way to explaining why the marriage did not work out, given the love between them.  

‘He’s just a complicated guy. I always say, ”When his sun shines on you, you feel it.’ But when the sun is shining elsewhere, it’s cold. He can cast quite a shadow”,’ she explained. 

It’s clear, however, that any difficulties in his marriage went far beyond a mere clash of personalities. 

He was admitted to rehab for treatment in 2001, and again in 2017 – two years after his split from Garner. 

In a statement he posted to his Facebook page, the two-time Oscar winner said: ‘I have completed treatment for alcohol addiction; something I’ve dealt with in the past and will continue to confront.’

‘I want to live life to the fullest and be the best father I can be. I want my kids to know there is no shame in getting help when you need it, and to be a source of strength for anyone out there who needs help but is afraid to take the first step.’

Ben, who separated from Jennifer in 2015, thanked his ‘co-parent’ and his friends for standing by him.

‘I’m lucky to have the love of my family and friends, including my co-parent, Jen, who has supported me and cared for our kids as I’ve done the work I set out to do,’ he wrote.

A year later, she stepped in to stage an intervention when he fell off the wagon and was pictured driving him to The Canyon live-in rehab facility, in Malibu.

Garner is said to have ‘read him the riot act’ a few weeks ago, telling him that he needed to clean up for the sake of their children.

She gave him both barrels while the pair were watching a children’s soccer game in front of other parents, Radar Online reported.

‘She doesn’t want her kids to grow up without a dad,’ the source said, adding that she told him to stop acting ‘selfish and childish’.

‘She believes he needs to start acting more like a dad and less like a kid

In June 2024, as rumours swirled that Ben and J-Lo’s marriage had hit the rocks, fears began to mount for the star’s sobriety.

Friends told DailyMail.com that the Argo star was suffering ‘acute sadness’ as his marriage collapsed.

One said: ‘I hear that he is drinking. He is full of demons – a really troubled person.’

While another added: ‘I have seen him looking glassy eyed and it is a real worry to everyone who cares about him.’

Affleck said that he first stopped drinking in 1997. 

He said then: ‘I just wanted to stop. I started regretting some things I did when I was drunk. It’s funny to be obnoxious or out of control, but then it’s like, “I think I hurt that person’s feelings”, “I made a fool of myself” or “I didn’t want to kiss that girl”. I have almost no inhibitions, so it’s dangerous for me.’

Bensought treatment for alcoholism in 2001 and again went to rehab in 2017 and 2018. The following year there was a setback when he was pictured leaving a Halloween party intoxicated. 

In 2020 he said: ‘People with compulsive behavior, and I am one, have this kind of basic discomfort all the time that they’re trying to make go away. You’re trying to make yourself feel better with eating or drinking or sex or gambling or shopping or whatever. But that ends up making your life worse.

‘Then you do more of it to make that discomfort go away. Then the real pain starts. It becomes a vicious cycle you can’t break. That’s at least what happened to me.’

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