WE all know the oppressive feeling you get when, after a long car journey, you suddenly hear a child having tantrums.
Whether or not you can sympathize with the parent, having to listen to a toddler’s screams all the time is never ideal.
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In a after A discussion arose on Mumsnet when a woman shared her recent experience of commuting.
“The second long train journey this weekend and again a whole carriage full of noisy, whining children,” she wrote.
The poster described the situation as far from ideal, calling the noisy nature of the children ‘irritating’.
She explained that “there [was] “Just a few more hours to go” on her journey and the noise showed no signs of abating.
“Parents just don’t seem to care,” the irritated woman wrote in her post.
She said her fellow travelers were also visibly irritated by the situation.
“[The] rest of the car [were] “They exchanged glances, rolled their eyes and sighed,” she explained.
However, the angry poster’s solution received mixed reactions from other Mumsnet users.
“Just give them tablets and headphones and the rest of us some peace and quiet,” she wrote.
She added that it is better to put your child in front of a screen than to have him or her disturb those around you.
Readers debated the practicality of the solution in the comments section.
“Totally agree. Children should be seen and not heard! How dare they be childish on public transport!” someone joked.
“Well done parents [for] “Don’t let your children have screens and headphones when you’re out and about,” said another Mumsnet user.
“There is still plenty of time for that when they are teenagers, just accept it and let children just be children.”
“Make sure you get some headphones and a tablet?” a third person suggested.
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AGAINST BOREDOM: Despite hours of activities and playdates, if your kids are already complaining that there’s nothing to do, parenting expert Liat Hughes Joshi says, “You don’t have to plan every second of the holiday. Kids benefit from boredom and learn to make their own fun.
“Boredom can stimulate creative and imaginative play, but you need to encourage children to get used to not being told how to spend their time.
“Away with the pleas of boredom. Respond with comments like, ‘What do you think you could do?’ and maybe put a list of ‘I’m bored’ activity ideas on the fridge.”
SCREEN OVERLOAD: It’s tempting to hire a digital sitter during the holidays, but don’t leave them staring at a screen all summer.
Liat says: “It’s unfair to expect older children to withdraw, but it’s important to set some ground rules.
“Create rules together for technology in the family. If you find yourself getting distracted by your phone, follow the rules. Maybe tell your kids that they can’t have screen time until they’ve done chores, done some sports, or played a board game.
“Are there times when you want to ban screens altogether? Maybe during dinner or when they have friends over.
“Technology is a battlefield for parents, but you have to set boundaries. Be firm and prepare to be unpopular.”
TOO MUCH COHERENCE: You love your kids, but being with them 24/7 can be exhausting. Don’t feel guilty if you need some downtime.
Liat says: “When you’re juggling work, household chores and the kids, it’s normal to start feeling overwhelmed or exhausted and in need of some rest.
“If you can’t afford or don’t want your kids to go to day camp, see if there are free workshops for kids so you can keep doing your work or take a break for a few hours.
“Taking a moment of peace and quiet every now and then doesn’t make you a bad parent. In fact, it probably makes you more positive and enthusiastic when you’re with your kids.”
CONFLICT OVER PLANNING: During the holidays, your schedule can get messed up, but if you go to bed late or wake up early, your kids are often tired and unhappy.
Dr Tamara Bugembe, paediatrician and founder of Helperbees.co.uk says: “Children become grumpy, test boundaries and become defiant when routines are broken.
“It’s a good idea to maintain some sort of routine during the holidays.
“We release hormones at different times of the day and when our regular meal and bedtimes are disrupted, it causes mood swings.
“The holidays are all about having fun, but going to bed early once or twice a week makes everyone happier.”
EXCESS ENERGY: Make sure children get outside in the fresh air to tire them out, and to make them healthier and happier.
Dr Bugembe says: “Sunshine also replenishes essential vitamin D levels, which helps improve bone strength and energy levels in children. Our levels are low in winter, so get children stocking up in warmer weather.
“Letting them run around in shorts and a T-shirt is the best way to get them pumped up. Make sure they wear sunscreen, get outside and have fun.
“Encourage them to try healthy habits like biking and walking. Hopefully they’ll get hooked and want to continue when the weather gets colder.”
However, other readers agreed that it is the responsibility of parents to do more to prevent these types of situations.
“If your children are making noise and disturbing others around them, which is very normal behavior for many children, parents should pay attention to that,” one person said.
“It is not good for children to disturb many people in a busy environment.
“A few hours of watching a good movie or playing a game on the iPad can’t hurt.”
“Seems like more and more idiots are raising antisocial little s**ts,” wrote another Mumsnet user.
“What happens on the train is not good parenting. And shoving children behind a screen to keep them quiet is not good parenting either,” one commenter noted.
