My 7 year old has been suspended ten times. He’s not naughty, he has special needs
When the phone started ringing, fear coursed through me. I knew who would call.
“An incident has occurred and we are suspending Josh again,” a familiar voice said. “How soon can you pick him up?”
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I had dropped my seven-year-old son off at school only an hour early, but bringing him home early had become a habit.
Last year he was suspended ten times, causing him to miss more than forty days of learning.
As his mother, I am acutely aware of how challenging Josh can be. His crimes are serious and usually involve lashing out at others.
On one occasion he hit a staff member with a piece of wood, and during lunch he stabbed another with a fork. He also set off the fire alarm.
READ MORE ABOUT ADHD AND AUTISM
But his actions were also a child crying out for support and help.
Football-loving Josh has ADHD, autism, pathological demand avoidance and sensory processing disorder.
It means he struggles emotionally with the strict rules of a busy school and can be overwhelmed by all the noise and people.
We are not the only family dealing with this.
Last week it was announced that suspensions in English public primary schools have more than doubled in the past ten years.
According to the Ministry of Education, there were 37,700 in the autumn term 2023-2024 – almost as many as in the entire academic year 2012-2013.
The permanent exclusion rate has also increased by almost 70 percent over the same period.
I suspected that Josh had additional needs from the time he was a toddler, but it wasn’t until November last year that he was officially recognized and given an education, health and care plan that set out the support he needed.
Devastating consequences
His mainstream primary school was unable to provide this or manage his behaviour, even after introducing a one-to-one teaching assistant and reducing his teaching schedule to a few hours a day.
Josh’s young age and neurodiversity prevented him from understanding what he had done wrong and why he was not welcome at school
Kyn Linton
The suspensions put me at a breaking point.
As a solo mom, I struggled with the consequences of Josh missing so much school.
He regularly has meltdowns at home and can become aggressive. He also has trouble sleeping.
I worried that he would never get an education if he rarely attended classes and struggled to participate when he did.
He was only in year 2 and it felt like society was already failing him.
As a former prison guard, I am convinced that my son will end up behind bars if he does not get the right support now
Kym Linton
Josh’s young age and neurodiversity prevented him from understanding what he had done wrong and why he was not welcome at school.
Like Josh, 97 per cent of those suspended or excluded from primary school in the past five years also had special educational needs, according to analysis carried out by children’s charity Chance UK.
The consequences of these decisions by schools are devastating.
I believe they send a terrible message to children who are already experiencing great difficulties in their young lives.
It tells them: you don’t belong. You are not welcome.
Then there are the academic impact and the long-term consequences for individuals and society. That should be a concern for everyone, not just their parents.
Chance UK says 90 percent of children are excluded from primary school failure to pass GCSE English and Maths.
As a former prison officer, I am convinced that my son will end up behind bars if he does not get the right support now.
I’m not being overly dramatic; I have seen firsthand the impact of school absenteeism. I worked in a male-only Category A prison for four years.
Many of the inmates I worked with were neurodivergent and turned to crime after missing school and being failed by an educational system that failed to provide for them.
I was a key person for five prisoners and part of my job involved taking them to weekly meetings, such as appointments at an ADHD clinic, as well as reading to them.
Many did not have a basic reading level because they had missed much of their education.
I got to know their backstories well, and whenever I asked how they ended up in prison, it was almost always the same premise: they had been expelled from school.
Their stories resonated with me because one of my relatives dropped out of school at the age of eleven and ended up in prison, where he could barely read and write. I was also expelled from school at 15 for being disruptive, smoking and skipping school.
Luckily the local authority allowed me to take my GCSE exams because I was smart.
It wasn’t until Josh was diagnosed that I realized I also had ADHD and understood why I was struggling with school. I wasn’t “naughty” – I needed extra support.
Why don’t we build more specialized schools, instead of building more prisons?
Kym Linton
Only now that I am in my 40s have I managed to realize my dream of going to university to study a degree in forensics and criminology.
But it’s extremely difficult to make this work when you’re caring for Josh, especially when he’s constantly being sent home.
There are tens of thousands of parents in a similar position.
The We Can Learn campaign, led by charities SEND Reform England, The Disabled Children’s Partnership and Let Us Learn Too, says 80 percent believe their children do not receive enough support to go to school, while almost four in ten have had to leave their jobs as a result.
I don’t blame the schools. Teachers are under enormous pressure to get good grades and ensure that other students can learn undisturbed.
But I do blame successive governments who are failing SEN children through a lack of investment and an obsession with league tables.
Given that almost all those excluded from primary school are SEN pupils, it would benefit everyone if they were able to access education in an appropriate and safe way.
This means faster diagnosis, more support within mainstream schools, more specialized classes and more SEN schools for those most in need.
I believe we will see a huge reduction in crime in the future – and fewer people going to jail. Why don’t we build more specialized schools, instead of building more prisons?
Heartache along the way
It makes financial sense. It costs £65,000 to jail someone, including police, court costs and everything else steps are taken into account.
Then it is £40,000 a year for the duration of their sentence. A SEN school place costs £10,000 per year.
The system is broken and the rising suspension rates are a symptom of that.
Families are completely abandoned and the treatment of these children is inhumane, leaving them on the margins from an early age.
Josh eventually moved to a SEN school in September.
But it took me three years of fighting to get him this specialist provision – and a lot of heartache along the way.
Because he misses so much school time, Josh struggles to maintain friendships and is not invited to parties.
He feels rejected and thinks everyone is talking about him, which has damaged his self-esteem.
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I also often felt like I was being judged, usually by other parents or strangers when we were out.
I do my best, but it makes you feel like a bad mother. I have no help and when I asked for a carer assessment I was told I didn’t meet the criteria.
Even now, after Josh moved to the SEN school, the problems persist.
He only goes to school about half the time because of all the trauma he’s been through.
My son – and all our children – deserve so much better.
‘Failed support leads to record exclusion levels’
UNMET needs and the pressure to achieve top academic results are driving suspension rates up, said Beth Prescott of think tank the Center for Social Justice.
Beth, CSJ’s Exclusion and Absence Program Lead, said: “Exclusion should be a last resort, but one that is available to schools to ensure safety and fair education for all.
“But the most common reason for suspension and exclusion is persistent, disruptive behavior – and often this is the result of unmet needs, with the impact of the pandemic, the cost of living crisis, mental health issues and a rise in the level of livelihood. of SEN that contributes to this.”
The CSJ calls for a national strategy for parent involvement to improve the relationship between school and home.
It also wants a national inclusion framework to support vulnerable students and additional extra-curricular activities such as sport to help children readjust.
“It is important that action is taken now,” says Beth.
“A child who has previously been excluded is less likely to enter education, employment and training, and is at greater risk of ending up in the criminal justice system.”
