‘Stay away,’ wedding experts urge over 10 ‘pitfalls’ that ruin speeches
It wouldn’t be a typical British wedding without a cheeky speech from the best man, a tearful tear from the mother of the bride or an impromptu chat from a family member who’s had one too many.
It’s fun to incorporate a little humor into your wedding speech, but the situation can quickly be ruined if the tone is off or you make too many inappropriate jokes.
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But marriage experts at Breeze have revealed the ten biggest mistakes to avoid when delivering an important wedding speech, to save yourself from disaster.
A spokesperson for Breezit said: “It’s incredibly important to tick the right boxes when giving a wedding speech, but it can be an incredibly daunting task.
“Everyone has different boundaries and it can be easy to cross the line, so it’s always best to err on the side of caution.
“Talking about previous romantic partners and personal comments are common pitfalls when it comes to wedding speeches, so definitely stay away from these.
“Happy and heartfelt memories of the bride and groom always add authenticity to a speech. So with a little preparation and thought, anyone can create a memorable moment for the bride and groom and their guests.”
Don’t make it all about you
It may be your speech, but like the rest of the day, it’s all about the happy couple. It’s important to make sure your tribute to the bride and groom doesn’t turn into a personal monologue.
So it is definitely not the time to make personal announcements. Pregnancy news or announcing your own engagement is absolutely taboo.
Do NOT make inappropriate jokes
Some people may find crude or inappropriate jokes funny, but not everyone does.
Breezit’s wedding experts advise against making sexually suggestive or offensive jokes, especially when it concerns the bride and groom.
Do NOT mention their exes
Mentioning the newlyweds’ exes should be a no-go area. Romantic history can be an awkward topic and even the most subtle mention can cause tension during the big day, so it’s best to avoid it.
The last thing you want is to reminisce about old loves on what should be the couple’s happiest day.
AVOID sowing doubt
Regardless of your personal luck in love, your wedding speech is far from the ideal place to express your thoughts on relationships.
Make sure not to sow any doubts, because that will really dampen the mood and make the rest of the evening feel a bit awkward.
DON’T TELL obscure stories
The mistake that is easily made is that you want to fill your speech with funny stories and inside jokes. If you tell these during your speech, you can isolate the rest of the guests who do not get the joke.
It’s best to avoid obscure anecdotes altogether so that your toast is light-hearted and relatable to everyone.
AVOID drinking too much
It’s normal to feel nervous when faced with the daunting task of public speaking, especially if it doesn’t come naturally to you.
It might seem like a good idea to calm your nerves with some liquid courage, but drinking too much before a speech can leave you slurring your words and forgetting your lines.
Wedding professionals recommend keeping drinks to a minimum until after the speech, then let loose and get the party started with the other guests.
Do NOT compare the day to other weddings
No one wants their big day to be compared to others, so it’s not exactly flattering to draw comparisons to the day that many couples have been dreaming about for years.
The Breezit wedding wizards warn against making comparisons in your speech. Every relationship and wedding is unique to the couple and no one likes to hear how much their special day reminds you of someone else’s.
AVOID distributing sensitive information
A wedding toast is not the place to air your dirty laundry. Family secrets, money matters, and sensitive information should be left out of the house when you’re giving your big speech.
If you spill tea on someone’s wedding day, you’ll be left off the Christmas card list, so it’s best to avoid this at all costs.
5 Ways to Save £10,000 on Your Wedding
Josie Griffiths, Deputy Editor of Digital Fabulous and bride-to-be, shares her tips for keeping the costs down on your big day.
Josie Griffiths said: “There’s no way around it, weddings are expensive, but there are some simple ways to keep costs down without your guests noticing.”
Skip the expensive invitations
We created our designs for free on Canva and then sent them out via email or WhatsApp. If you want to send out invites to important people, VistaPrint is brilliant and cost us less than 30p per guest to sort. SAVINGS: £600
Less flowers
I was quite surprised that many wedding florists quote £3k-£5k as a MINIMUM spend. Your wedding flowers will be dead within a few days, save your money and invest it in photos and videos as they really do last a long time. Keep shopping around until you find someone who has a reasonable price, or speak to your local florist two months in advance to arrange bouquets. SAVINGS: £4.5k
Skip the wedding favors
They don’t fit in people’s handbags and have been picked up by the catering staff at half the weddings I’ve attended. The best way to save money here is to just not do it. SAVE: £300-£700
Be ruthless with your guest list
No one is ‘entitled’ to a plus one and the groom’s cousin doesn’t have to come. Your real friends won’t be in the picture and if someone chooses not to come because of guest list drama, it just means you’ve saved twice. SAVINGS: £150 PER HEAD
Make your own drink
Make it a priority to find a venue that allows you to run your own bar, ideally with no corkage or a cap of £500. Aldi’s £22 Champagne beat Veuve Clicquot in a Which? blind taste test and they have some great wines for under a fiver, you won’t do better in a paid bar. SAVINGS: £2k
Don’t improvise too much
It doesn’t hurt to improvise occasionally, but this can lead to confusing digressions and the loss of your sense of direction, leaving your speech completely messed up.
It may seem too stiff and structured, but sometimes it’s better to just stick to the script. It shows that you’ve thought ahead and are prepared with a thoughtful and pre-planned tribute to the newlyweds on their special day.
AVOID long speeches
Wedding experts recommend keeping your speech short, sweet, and to the point so guests don’t fall asleep at the end.
Long, drawn-out toasts can ruin the rest of the day. Most weddings have a busy schedule and you don’t want to disrupt the day. Keep it short and sweet so guests don’t get bored and the festivities can continue.
