The ex-husband humiliated by Jeff Bezos just pulled out a Hollywood master class in revenge. His timing was flawless … It must be the conversation of that messy wedding! Amanda Goff

Oh, to be a paparazzi drone floating over Venice this weekend.

Not to admire the canals, or the picturesque architecture that is steeped in Italian history, but to get the money of what unfolds as the showy spectacle of the century: the $ 20 million (!) Wedding of Amazon Founder Jeff Bezos And Lauren Sanchez.

I hate to admit it, but some of me wonder about the glamor, the wealth, the dresses – in particular Lauren’s stunningly tight and ridiculously expensive Golden Corset – but I am also the grain on the circus that it has become.

And that is not my way. It is said that furious locals call it ‘Il Circo. ‘

While the rest of humanity googles ‘How to Survive WWIII’, say the Geeky bookseller who becomes the world’s third-rich man and his space is cowgirl ‘I do’ In a wedding so spectacular tone deaf that it almost feels like performance art.

If you read my columns, you know I like Lauren. She has balls, she is fierce and – if someone who is no stranger to the knife of the surgeon – I think she looks hot at the age of 55. She is probably quite a nice woman – I mean, Jeff loves her. But this ‘Circo’? Jeez. Come on, Lauren, even your biggest fan here is shrinking.

Let’s start with the foam party – because there is nothing as stylish and romantic as sliding in shared bath water filled with the edge with fairy liquid. Then the invitations that some remarked looked like they had been hit by a sixth class that Canva used for a school project.

While the guest list reads such as Hollywood Royalty (Hello, Kim Kardashian and a single-and-ready-to-mingle Orlando Bloom), a man who has succeeded in exceeding and, to be honest, surpassed the whole ridiculous spectacle: Patrick Whitesell.

Do you remember him? Maybe not, because he likes to stay outside the media. He used to be married to Lauren, before Jeff glanced at her and decided, “She’s mine.”

Nowadays, the 60-year-old PAT prefers to chill at home in his $ 57 million Bel-Air mansion, far away from foam parties, wrinkled linen shirts and loafers that have only touched the floor plates of multimillion dollar super yachts.

He is known as the ‘super agent’ of Hollywood. As an executive chairman of Endeavour – once a talent agency, now a megacompany that has everything, from IMG to UFC – he has represented the will of Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Jackman and Ben Affleck.

Yet the most impressive thing about Pat is beautiful Australian woman, Pia Whitesell.

We knew her as Pia Miller on the day she was married to a local football player. She is also – probably – the most beautiful woman who comes from the southern hemisphere.

But long before he set his sights on Pia, 41, Pat was married to Lauren and one day made the Rookie error to introduce his wife to a friend who was much richer than he: Jeff. It was an introduction that caused his marriage to explode.

Poor Patrick, despite all his wealth and success, was left as a valued turnip when the Lauren and Jeff affair later was splashed over the gossip magazines.

Reports at that time indicated that he was ‘blinded’ by the affair. Sources near Jeff and his then wife Mackenzie Scott insisted that they had separated themselves before he started dating Sanchez.

It was all quite a mess – a very public and embarrassing, and especially for Patrick, who is used to visiting damage to his celebrity customers, not himself.

But Patrick didn’t get angry – he even became.

After his wife had left him, he grabbed a beautiful woman in his junior for almost two decades. They are engaged and then married. He flew to Sydney to charm her family. Now Pia and her two sons from earlier relationships live the dream in Pat’s La Mansion.

I am sure that Jeff and Lauren are currently happy as Larry in Venice, but every disintegration needs a winner, and it is clear as a day who the winners are here.

Because in the midst of the madus, the circus, the drones and diamonds, Pia sent a message days before the wedding that everyone seems to have missed.

She placed the most wonderfully icy comeback on Instagram. Return back in the pool at her bell air at home – with no paparazzo or cowboy boot in sight – she took a snap and scored: “How is the serenity.”

It was a perfectly encrypted message for her colleague Aussies at home: a quote from a beloved film, The Castle, pronounced by a man who admired the modest view from his holiday caravan, completely unjustified by the nearby electricity lines and airport floatingige.

The meaning was clear: Forget the sound. We are completely happy here.

Well played, Pia. I can just introduce Patrick out of the shot and sip a martini next to you.

It was brutal, it was modest and it was flawlessly timed. Bravo to the Whitesells. IF was this a game – and isn’t Love A Game? – Then I awarded you the winners.

No need for screaming headlines or public screenings of tasteless wealth. Just a somewhat self -satisfied silence that says to the rest of the world: “Keep the madness – we will have peace.”

Patrick Koos Happiness above bitterness – and that is really the best kind of revenge. Indeed, he even hit his ex-wife through the aisle and married Pia in 2021.

Now I may have chosen a side here – but I still want to extend my congratulations to Lauren and Jeff during their wedding weekend. Yes, it looks tasteless, but some people like that! I hope the cake is beautiful, don’t slide into the hot tub, and hopefully that corset has not crushed internal organs.

While I offer the lucky couple a hand, I dull my hat on the ex-husband.

There are few things in life that are more satisfactory than the revenge of the Cuckold, and he played it out with real Hollywood -Flair. I am sure he was the conversation of the wedding when Jeff and Lauren had outside hearing distance.

Why wouldn’t he be? He was humiliated by one of the richest people on earth, but came out of the richer man.