Former pastor Richard Coles reveals he lied to church about sex with his late husband, saying it felt 'like I was in the resistance and they were the Gestapo'

Reverend Richard Coles has revealed he lied to the church about being celibate while married to his late husband.

In an interview with The timesthe former Communards star and famous former preacher said of his relationship with the church: 'I sometimes felt like I was in the resistance and they were the Gestapo.'

Coles, 61, who recently lost his mother Elizabeth, was married to Anglican priest David Oldham for nine years before Oldham died in 2019 from alcoholism.

Writer and presenter Coles, currently on tour with his Borderline National Trinket show, has written a memoir The Madness of Grief, about living with someone in the grip of alcohol addiction – and the 'paralyzing' period of grief that followed.

In the article published this week, Coles revealed why he chose not to be honest while working for the church, saying he felt his former employers had done so. “no moral cause, so I didn't feel like I had a moral obligation at all.”

Coles, who retired as a minister in Finedon, near Peterborough, in April 2022, said he felt he had “no moral obligation” to be honest with the church about his private life.

Coles, who was pastor of St Mary the Virgin Church in Finedon, near Peterborough, from 2011 until April 2022 when he retired, added: “I am not the first person who has felt obliged for institutional reasons to lying in the Church of England.'

The ex-pop star, who presented BBC Radio's Saturday Live for 12 years before quitting the show last year, said that although church attendance is declining, those who remain are often more conservative in their views.

He said: 'The great figure is one of steepness [church] decline, but within that decline there are also areas where things are going well, and these are often people who are very conservative.'

Richard revealed in 2023 that he has found love again with actor Dickie Cant, 58, (pictured in 2019), some three and a half years after his husband's death

The broadcaster, who appeared on Strictly Come Dancing in 2017, announced earlier this month that his mother Elizabeth had died

Coles is currently in a relationship with actor Dickie Cant, 58, the son of Brian Cant, who presented children's programs such as Playschool and Dappledown Farm in the 1960s and 1970s.

Coles met Dickie on the dating site Elite Singles and hit it off straight away, with Coles suggesting marriage could be on the cards soon, telling The Times he could 'imagine it going that way'. The 58-year-old actor, from Kent, has played a leading role in Mary Queen of Scots, Stan & Ollie and Doctor Who.

The famous preacher took to Twitter on Friday evening to share a photo of his mother smiling on her wedding day as he revealed the sad news

Earlier this month, Coles told X, formerly Twitter, that his mother had passed away.

He shared a photo of her and wrote: 'Mom passed away last night. Here she is on her wedding day, smiling. No mama's boy (hello) could have asked for more. REST IN PEACE'

Before his husband's death, the couple lived in the rectory of St Mary's with their dogs Daisy, Pongo, Audrey and Horatio.

They met after David approached Richard for advice about joining the clergy and soon developed romantic feelings for each other, but maintained a celibate relationship.

Oldham's death in December 2019 shocked parishioners as he kept his ill health private as he battled illness for more than a year.

David, who was becoming increasingly ill with liver disease, was determined to keep the drinking problem that eventually killed him a secret, but there were public outbursts, including one involving the police.

After David died, Rev. Richard explained how he asked his partner's family for permission to share his life experiences with an addict – in the hope of helping others in the same situation.

The star admitted last June that he thought he was 'out of the game' following the death of his beloved husband.

Speaking about Lorraine he said: 'I wanted to meet someone who had been around and wanted to share a life with someone. I thought I was out of the game when David died.”

He revealed that he had lost David and that getting back into the dating game felt like 'a polar bear coming out of hibernation and looking for a seal', but using a dating app helped him gain confidence and find love again.

Reverend Richard retired a year ago because he could not apologize for the Church of England 'not treating people fairly' in relation to its position on homosexuality.