DEAR JANE: My girlfriend’s DOG is ruining our sex life – how can I convince her to get rid of him?

Dear Jane,

My girlfriend and I have been living together for a year now – and a few months ago we got a new roommate: her family dog. Her parents bought her the dog as a graduation present (she’s now 26) and have cared for him for the past year while we settled into our new home.

It was always the plan that the dog would end up with us, and I was more than happy that that happened!

I admit it was a bit difficult when he first arrived… I didn’t grow up with dogs so I had no idea how much work it is to care for them, and for the first few weeks I found it very difficult to get my dogs think of how much our lives had to change to accommodate him.

But eventually we discovered our rhythm.

Dear Jane, My girlfriend’s dog is destroying our sex life. I don’t think I can tolerate much more of his behavior, but I don’t know how to tell her

That applies to every aspect of our lives except one: sex.

The dog has been with us for three months now and in that time we have had sex twice. Not for lack of trying, I should point out! But every time we even try to go there, the dog gets in the way.

When he is in the room he jumps on the bed and starts barking and jumping around, thinking we are playing some kind of game. If we lock him out of the room, he whines all the time until we give in and let him in. We tried putting him in his crate and the same thing happened. Not exactly the most romantic soundtrack…

The two times we’ve had sex were on a weekend away when we put the dog in a kennel overnight – but that’s not really something we want or can afford to do all the time just so we can have sex !

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Part of me thinks it would be easiest if the dog went back to my girlfriend’s parents, but I can’t bring myself to even suggest that to my girlfriend because I know she would be so angry if she were to give him up.

Do you see another option?

By,

Doggy desperation

Dear Doggy Despair,

Don’t despair – I definitely see another option, and I encourage you to consider it, not least because I have always observed a link between poorly behaved dogs and poorly behaved children; What I’m about to suggest will make your entire life easier, largely by taking back control and teaching the dog (and possibly in the future the children) boundaries.

The dog runs the show, which is a disaster for everyone, as you discover.

The quickest and easiest way to correct the force dynamics in this situation is to pay much more attention to crate training.

I see that you already have a crate, but at this point the dog thinks he is being punished if he is put in it. He must learn that the crate is his safe place, where he must be quiet and calm and wait for his masters to release him.

Crate training is just like any form of parenting: there’s a right way and a wrong way, and you’ll have to educate yourself on the steps you need to take to do it the right way, to ensure the dog likes the house don’t whine.

You’ll find plenty of videos online, but boundaries need to be set or you’re in for a miserable few years.

A poorly behaved dog is a nightmare for everyone, but the dog cannot teach itself how to behave properly.

I wish you good luck!

Dear Jane,

Over the past six months, I’ve made quite a bit of money posing photos of myself on OnlyFans. I don’t pose naked or anything, I just share photos of myself in sexy lingerie – and charge guys extra for special one-off images of me striking certain poses, or videos of me telling them how sexy they are.

As far as X-rated content goes, it’s pretty harmless – and it’s also the only way I can afford to get my master’s degree.

But a few days ago, one of my father’s employees came across my account and told me about it.

He screenshotted my photos and showed them to my father, who was quite disgusted by my choice to share this content online.

I’ve tried to reason with him and explain my thinking behind this whole thing, but he just can’t see past the thought of his ‘little girl’ posing for such provocative photos and then selling them, especially if those photos are then found could be. by people he works with. He even compared it to prostitution, which was horrible to hear.

I don’t want to make him unhappy, I really don’t. But I also don’t want to give up this side hustle that actually helped me get out of debt and is financing my entire future.

Is there a compromise you think we can reach?

By,

X-rated pain

Dear X-rated Agony,

First of all, I don’t think you did anything wrong.

As you said yourself, the poses are quite innocent, and the fact that your father has now discovered that his little girl is in fact a sexual being may be uncomfortable for him, but I applaud you for standing strong and refusing to ashamed or shocked by his reaction.

Student debt can be crippling, and while it doesn’t apply to everyone, posing in lingerie seems like a pretty smart way to finance your future.

I certainly don’t think you need to compromise other than asking your father to make it clear to his employees that he doesn’t want to see what you do on Only Fans.

You’re an adult and your father can no longer tell you what to do.

There are always choices our children make that we don’t agree with, but unconditional love is unconditional love, and while he may see this as a bad choice, it doesn’t have to affect his love for you, something that needs to be explained to it.

It may take some time for him to adjust, but you have already proven your maturity in the way you have talked to him, and now I think you are allowing time for the wounds to heal.