How England boss Gareth Southgate was forged by his no-nonsense mum… and I should know, she was my school dinner lady!

Behind every successful man, as the saying goes, is a strong woman. But while England manager Gareth Southgate Although he has lavished praise on his wife Alison, she is not the only influential lady in his life.

Because when it comes to his decency, honesty and kindness – not the qualities that come with every football figure – it is 53-year-old Southgate’s beloved but no-nonsense mother, Barbara, who he can thank.

Young star Gareth Southgate collects a football trophy in the Crawley area of ​​West Sussex

Barbara worked as a dinner lady at Pound Hill Middle School in Crawley, where Katie Hind was a student

Gareth’s childhood home. Katie saw Barbara most mornings, carrying a shopping bag and a big smile as she walked to class in Crawley

Proud Gareth (circled) holding his individual trophy along with the rest of his under 12 teammates in the city

When he married Alison, a former flight attendant, in 1997, they chose St. Nicholas Church, a short distance from his parental home.

Barbara, a pillar of the community in the Sussex town of Crawley where he grew up, was often seen on the sidelines as Gareth learned his trade on Sunday mornings.

But although she was always a devoted mother, Barbara also had a stricter side. And I should know because she worked as a dinner lady at Pound Hill Middle School, where I was a student. Gareth had been there too, but ten years earlier.

I saw Barbara most mornings, carrying a shopping bag and a big smile as I walked to class.

But she certainly wasn’t averse to reprimanding those of us who tested our luck in the playground.

I still giggle with friends when we remember the time when there were six or seven pupils queuing in shame for disobeying Mrs Southgate or being ‘lippy’ to her.

Barbara was also a classroom assistant, working with children who were struggling personally or academically. She did that with compassion.

He later became England manager and is leading the team to the European Championship, which starts today

He took the team to the semi-finals of the 2018 World Cup, where they lost to Croatia

I was eleven when I heard her tell a troubled student that her son had found tickets for him to watch Crystal Palace, Southgate’s first professional club.

I will never forget that boy’s smile. And it was Barbara who ensured that Southgate, despite his new found wealth as a player, stayed in touch with his roots.

I remember her dragging him to Pound Hill’s Summer Fair, where he was mobbed by my classmates wanting a photo or an autograph.

Although not yet a household name, Gareth – as we still called him – was a superstar for us.

He even agreed to participate in a rounders game, although he was immediately caught.

Friends say the English manager had a “happy, happy” childhood growing up in a four-bedroom semi-detached house with Barbara’s father Clive, who worked for computer giant. IBMand sister Claire.

His father was involved in Crawley Athletics club where Claire, a netball player and high jump specialist, spent much of her spare time.

Southgate was also a member of the 4th Worth Scouts. “Gareth always stuck with what he did,” one troop member recalls.

“He was very nice then, just as he seems to be now.

“He was always the one of us with the most Scout badges. He had a lot of them.’

When Gareth married Alison, a former air hostess, in 1997, they chose St Nicholas’ Church, a short distance from his parental home. Crowds of locals showed up to show their support.

I was there and the sidewalk was so packed you’d think Take That were in town.

It is believed that Barbara’s influence also underlies her son’s dressing sense and handy wardrobe.

When he took over as England manager in 2016, he became known for a £65 Marks & Spencer waistcoat, which he teamed with crisp shirts and a tie.

There was a different, more relaxed style on display at the final Euros of 2021, when Southgate wore a range of polo shirts and shackets – a cross between a shirt and a jacket – from British label Percival.

And this time his ‘look’ will be based on quite expensive knits. The new collection, shown this month in GQ magazine, includes a £3,325 cream cardigan and £620 linen twill trousers, both from Loro Piana – an Italian brand worn by David Beckham.

But clothing has long been an interest for him.

Classmates from forty years ago remember him as the best-dressed student in Form 3B, and how he wore a tie at Pound Hill even though it was not school rule to do so.

But it was Southgate’s friendliness at school and single-minded dedication to football that stood out to most of his fellow pupils.

One of them, Georgina MacKenzie – who was in his class from 1977 to 1982 – says he had no time for romantic talk.

“He did have a strange girl who fancied him, but he was too interested in his sport to worry about it,” she recalls.

‘During the breaks he was constantly on the playground playing football. He was a fanatic. He wasn’t into girls then.

“He had a small group of friends, a gang of guys he hung out with. He was very kind to everyone in the class, even though he was very determined even then.’

For all of Southgate’s on-field abilities as a player and manager, he is still best known for his human strengths, including the respect he commands from the crowd and the England team.

When squad members arrived at their hotel Germany for the Euro, which starts tonight, they found a welcome pack with individually selected sweets and handwritten notes from their families – a typical Southgate touch.

After Pound Hill, Southgate went to his local secondary school, Hazelwick, where the motto on his blazer was ‘effort achieved’. There, at the age of 16, he was asked to make a choice between football and academic studies.

Crystal Palace wanted to put Southgate on their books, but his teachers had other ideas and tried to convince him to turn down the offer. They failed.

Later, when the 1996 Euros came to Wembley, Southgate arranged tickets for staff at his former school, including his old teacher.

“He was so smart,” she said at the time, clearly disappointed he didn’t go on to A-level.

Today, multi-millionaire Gareth Southgate is still a private, cerebral man, preferring to live quietly in the Yorkshire countryside with Alison, 57, daughter Mia, 23, 18-year-old son Flynn and two dogs, a Labrador and a cockapoo. named Ted.

Alison is in love with them and Southgate jokes that the dogs sit above him in the family pecking order.

Southgate once said that he had ‘never been good at gambling, drinking, fighting, tantrums and celebrity’. Instead he has spent his money on a Grade II listed 16th century mansion with a great hall, wine cellar and cinema room.

Southgate enjoys small family gatherings at Bettys in nearby Harrogate, where his favorite treat is a £4.25 Yorkshire Fat Rascal Scone.

He is also interested in the local fish and chip shop, the Wetherby Whaler.

And what about his mother Barbara? Now in her 80s, will she watch as England take on Serbia in their first match of the tournament?

That is almost certainly the case. She has always followed his career closely and was closely involved when her son missed a penalty in the 1996 European Championship semi-finals – which condemned England to defeat by Germany – claiming at the time that he simply ‘went with it should have hit’.

These days, however, Barbara keeps a low profile and is still rather haunted by the publicity from all those years ago.

Let us hope that her son, for her and for us, can dispel such unhappy memories, prove his old-fashioned motto, ‘effort achieves’, to be true – and lead England to European Championship glory. Their first game is Sunday evening.