What’s your partner really clicking on when you’re not looking? Tracey Cox reveals the porn categories soaring in popularity – and they might surprise you

January. The month when people are most likely to try to give up smoking, stop drinking and hit the gym.

It’s also when the world’s most popular porn site (Pornhub) releases its year in review: the trends, terms and searches that have been the most popular in 2023.

Want to know what your partner’s up to when they sneak off to the office to ‘do some emails’ late at night?

Chances are this is what they’re really clicking on…

LESBIAN ‘SCISSORING’  

“What the hell is that?” asked a male friend of mine, who isn’t lacking in sexual experience. His wife, innocent in comparison, knew immediately.

Lesbian scissoring is now a ‘thing’. Searches for it grew by 151 per cent last year and ‘lesbian’ was the third most searched term in 2023. Americans, especially, love to watch woman-on-woman action.

What is lesbian scissoring? It’s a sexual position where two females rub their vulvas against each other, usually by intertwining their legs. The easiest way to picture it, is to make ‘scissors’ with your forefinger and middle finger of each hand, then put them together so the bits where your fingers join your hands are touching.

You don’t need to be a lesbian to get satisfaction from the concept: she can rub her vulva against a male partner’s arm, thigh or other body part to stimulate herself. The appeal of it in real life? You can reach an orgasm without penetration or using the mouth or tongue. If you’re after completely safe sex and happy to leave your clothes on, the only thing that beats scissoring is mutual masturbation from a distance.

Onscreen, it’s enjoyed by men because it’s something that only women can enjoy. Plus, he gets a glorious view of two female bodies, without one being obscured by the other.

WHY MEN LIKE WATCHING IT

It’s double the girl action, what’s not to like?

It’s what I imagine two women together would do. I love my girlfriend’s vagina. I imagine all women love their vaginas. Why wouldn’t you want them to ‘kiss’ and rub against each other?

I don’t have to look at another man’s penis. I don’t have to worry if it’s bigger or thicker than mine. I’m less distracted and can focus purely on the action.

I love looking at naked women and get two for the price of one. I don’t look at the man’s body in porn – I’m not interested at all. Heterosexual men don’t want to see men doing sexual things, we want to see women doing them.

WHAT WOMEN THINK OF IT

This category of porn is even more popular with women than men. Not surprising, given a lot of straight women prefer to watch lesbian porn generally.

I’d much rather my husband watch lesbian porn. It’s gentler and there’s no violence or ‘choking’. If he’s going to use porn as sex education, the ‘lessons’ from watching lesbian porn are much more female friendly.

I only watch lesbian porn. So, if he wants me to watch it with him, this is what’s on offer. I like watching scissoring or women giving each other oral sex. I didn’t mind traditional male porn until I clicked on something that showed a girl who was clearly drugged, being forced into giving a man oral sex. It made me feel angry and feel physically sick. This just doesn’t happen in lesbian porn.

Scissoring porn focuses on women’s pleasure. It’s not all about women worshipping the man’s penis.

HENTAI (ANIMATED PORN)

‘Hentai’ topped 2023’s most searched for term on Pornhub– and it’s held the top spot three years in a row.

Put simply, Hentai is porn that comes in cartoons or anime (hand-drawn or computer-generated animation originated from Japan. In Japanese, hentai means ‘perverse’.) It’s the most popular porn for Millennials and young adults.

Pornhub’s statisticians believe the popularity of video games like ‘Zelda’ and the general popularity of anime could account for the rise. (If you enjoy something in real life, porn makers will find a way to sexualise it!)

Sex researchers believe the cartoon format removes it from reality, so people feel less guilty enjoying forbidden acts. Because it’s animation, there’s also no chance of a real human being exploited.

I checked it out because I never have and, to be fair, some of it is quite funny and relatively innocent. But not so fast in thinking it’s all quite sweet.

As with video games, violence and abuse are often the ‘entertainment’. In Hentai porn, it’s common for monsters, demons and giant plants to rape cartoon women. Bestiality is a common theme.

Another worrying feature of the genre is that the characters are ‘innocent’ sexually. Child-like. Critics worry Hentai normalises children as appropriate sexual partners.

WHY MEN LIKE WATCHING IT

Most men considered it far more acceptable than watching traditional porn.

I love gaming so this is a natural leap for me. It’s like a platform where your darkest fantasies are alive and visible. But it’s still pretend. I like the way the characters are hypersexualised. The men have gigantic penises. The women have even bigger breasts.

It’s silly and fun. In the last video I watched, a plant with a long tentacle had sex with a woman. I mean how can I take that seriously? Some of it is very funny.

It’s pure escapism. It’s like being air dropped into sexual nirvana: the most perfect sexual world you could ever imagine.

WHAT WOMEN THINK OF IT

Some women found it disturbing but most found it less offensive than real people porn.

If the woman is a woman and not child-like, it’s totally fine. But there’s way too much of it that centres on young girls. That stuff is totally creepy.

Lots of men think ‘real’ porn is ‘real’ sex. They think the sex they see onscreen is how sex with their girlfriend will be or should be. At least if he’s watching a cartoon that features fantastical beasts and monsters, he can’t use it as an instruction video.

I like that no-one has been manipulated into doing anything they don’t want to. Watching normal porn upsets me. I can’t help but scrutinise the women’s faces to see if the sex is consensual. Frankly, most of the time it seems like it isn’t.

MATURE PORN

Good news for those of us getting on a bit: searches for ‘mature’ porn grew by 77 per cent and became the second most popular category chosen by men.

‘Mature cougar’ led the way, ‘MILF’ was the second most searched term worldwide and ‘DILF’ grew by 71 per cent. Granny searches were up by 132 per cent with terms like ‘sexy granny’ frequently trending.

WHY MEN LIKE WATCHING IT

A huge response to this one.

I like MILF porn because the women are more dominant. They’re more likely to be in charge, be the ones initiating sex. I’m not into full on BDSM videos but I do like to see a woman take control. I wish my wife would do that in real life. All she does is reject sex, she never suggests it.

It’s the opposite to what I have. My girlfriend is young and hot. The women I watch are much older and not particularly attractive. Sometimes I feel intimidated by how perfect my girlfriend is. Maybe I like this genre because in this scenario, I would be the ‘hot one’ and less nervous during sex.

Young guys watching mature porn is all about confidence. A lot of us have performance anxiety. It’s stressful having to satisfy young women. In mature porn, she does all the work, and you get to lie back and enjoy.

WHAT WOMEN THINK ABOUT IT

There was a satisfying kick to the answers women gave for this one. Ageism might still be in force but we’re fighting back.

I think it’s a step in the right direction. I’m in my late 60s and I enjoy sex immensely. My body might not conform to idealised concepts of what ‘sexy’ looks like – I’m not young and toned and thin – but I feel desirable and I am. The fact some women find granny porn ‘disgusting’ or ‘hideous’ is a sad indication of just how ageist our society is.

I like older men. Why would I want to watch porn where some young guy seduces the woman? Older men focus more on foreplay and it’s the same in porn. Young guys are all about their penis.

Men have always liked older women. They think she could teach them a thing or two, be less worried about her body, more adventurous. One thing I don’t like though. I hate it when the older woman is portrayed as desperately grateful for the attention. As a victim. That I hate.

AMATEUR PORN

It’s a constant feature on the ‘most watched’ list since the website started its yearly roundup of what’s popular.

2023 was no exception.

Amateur porn is exactly what it sounds like: porn featuring homemade videos of ‘ordinary’ people in their own houses and bedrooms.

‘Homemade (videos of) swingers’ and ‘homemade threesomes’ are popular search terms; as are terms like ‘real’ (‘real orgasm’, ‘real couple’).

Women view amateur porn more than men do. Which isn’t surprisingly when you consider professional porn is heavily peppered with less relatable women who’ve had lots of surgery.

WHY MEN LIKE WATCHING IT:

The popular assumption that all men want to watch the clichéd ‘porn star’ (big lips and breasts, hairless genitals, bleached bit) isn’t true. ‘Real’ women were far more appealing, according to the men I spoke to.

It’s more relatable. The people have ordinary looking bodies and faces. The men’s penises aren’t 10 foot long.

It’s more realistic. Professional porn can look very staged, the scenarios are implausible, and the locations don’t look real. Reality porn is often filmed in someone’s bedroom – and it’s even better if they don’t bother tidying up. You can imagine yourself there: a porn set looks like a porn set.

The people look like they’re enjoying themselves. Authenticity is the main reason why I like it: the moans aren’t for the camera, they’re genuine. There’s less moaning because, in real life, people don’t make that much noise all the time.

The themes are ‘healthier’. The porn industry is obsessed with ‘step-porn’, the rest of the world isn’t out there doing that.

WHAT WOMEN THINK OF IT:

It’s a thumbs up from women.

Real-life couples are more believable. I struggle to orgasm during sex and only climax with a long-term partner. I like porn that mirrors what I experience.

People look normal. If I’m watching porn with my partner, I don’t want to look at an army of silicone enhanced blondes. It’s far less threatening if you’re watching a woman with normal size breasts and a belly.

There’s less ‘rough stuff’. Porn stars are paid to pretend they like choking and being roughed up. Real life couples don’t do that to each other. You see little hints in their body language when they’re having sex that they’re checking the other is OK. The sex is way more respectful.

Check out Tracey’s new products in her two product ranges – Supersex and Edge – sold exclusively on lovehoney.