STEPHEN DAISLEY: Who won the debate? Given the absence of the Greens, I’d say the viewers

When they arrived here in 2010, freshly imported from across the Pound, the televised leaders’ debates seemed fresh, slick and exciting. Well, exciting for political anoraks, whose evenings are otherwise spent debating the merits of the single transferable vote.

Last night’s Scottish debate confirmed that the luster has faded from this televised battle. Maybe it’s because the outcome of the election seems like a foregone conclusion, but all the personalities gathered in the STV studio felt quite subordinate to the final outcome.

Scottish leaders met just hours later Nigel Farage‘s dramatic return to frontline politics and amid rumors that his entry into the electoral fray could see consequences Tories come third.

Anas Sarwar, John Swinney, Colin Mackay, Douglas Ross and Alex Cole-Hamilton prepare for the STV Scottish Leaders’ Debate

Host Colin Mackay moderated between John Swinney, Douglas Ross, Anas Sarwar and Alex Cole-Hamilton. No one from the Scottish Greens was invited to participate.

If only Holyrood worked like that.

Standing in front of a backdrop that resembled a recycled 1990s game show, Mackay joked: “All the parties here have changed leaders in the last five years. Some more than once.’

Tory leader Douglas Ross went first with a direct-to-camera statement, saying: ‘The SNP are out, but we have to get them out.’

He spoke in a somber tone, making it sound like he was trying to sell you a pre-paid funeral plan.

The country was ‘crying out for change’ according to Anas Sarwar, who seemed to dare to see how many times he could use the word ‘change’ in ninety minutes.

Everyone knew the Westminster system was ‘broken’, Swinney said, although his declaration that ‘Scotland deserves better’ was brave coming from the leader of the SNP.

Alex Cole-Hamilton, God love him, was just happy to be there. “We’re having a great election,” he chirped. ‘Look at the smile on my face!’

The evening consisted largely of the Sarwar and Swinney Show, where the two grilled each other about taxing energy giants. Cole-Hamilton stunningly told Mackay that climate change was down to “the geology baked into the North Sea floor.”

Swinney pressed Sarwar on what cuts Labor would make to balance the books, but his opponent denied there would be any. Maybe they’ll plant a new magical money tree.

All eyes are on body language in these matters. Sarwar went in for the tip of the pinched finger and jabbed as if swiping an invisible paintbrush across a canvas.

Swinney did horizontal hand chops as if he were fending off an army of fringe ninjas. Cole-Hamilton opted for the praying bowed hands favored by Tony Blair and concerned preachers delivering sermons.

The cross-examination section saw the blossoming of a political bromance between Sarwar and Cole-Hamilton, who clashed and traded opportunities to bash their mutual enemies.

Oh, the loving looks they exchanged as they thoughtfully agreed that the SNP and the Tories were absolute bastards.

Ross retaliated by taking a dig at the Lib Dems’ fishing policy and revealing that Cole-Hamilton was not fully aware of the details of his party’s plans.

He also showed remorse by admitting he had been wrong to back Liz Truss’s disastrous mini-budget, saying he assumed Downing Street had done the necessary work behind the scenes.

However, the conservative referee received a yellow card for making a joke about the VAR.

“Independence is the solution to austerity, Brexit and the cost of living crisis,” Swinney declared, attacking the “folly of decision-making at Westminster”.

He took incoming fire from Ross over ferries, education and Michael Matheson, while Cole-Hamilton cornered him over Nicola Sturgeon’s decision to delete her Covid-era posts.

Swinney claimed that while he also destroyed communications, he was adhering to Scottish Government policy to retain information.

Sarwar opened his cross-examination by declaring ‘John, you lead a party mired in sleaze and scandal’, and then invited the SNP chief to agree that everyone should vote Labour, a proposal that Swinney did not particularly like. would like to endorse.

The winner of the debate? Given the absence of Patrick Harvie or Lorna Slater, I’d say: the viewers.