The voice of the subway finally speaks for itself

It’s a voice unmistakable to millions of harried New York City subway passengers, telling them to “please move away from the edge of the platform” or that the next train is “approaching the station.”

It’s deep and sounds authoritative, even reassuring. But behind those disembodied, familiar memories lay a secret. Bernie Wagenblast, the voice actor and traffic reporter who found success as one of the Metropolitan Transportation Authority’s most recognizable voices, knew that despite living most of her life as a man, she was a transgender woman. And at 65, she wanted to live as one.

She had kept the secret for sixty years because she was paralyzed by what the truth could bring: “Would this make me a laughing stock? Would this make me a source of pity? Would this jeopardize my safety?” A marriage and a family were built on the promise that no one would reveal that secret.

Ms. Wagenblast, originally from Cranford, NJ, publicly came out as a woman just over a year ago. Because New Yorkers and tourists know her voice from the subway, her story has attracted media attention as far away as the Netherlands, Japan and Kazakhstan.

Her broadcast voice was made to be male. It’s a relic of a past life, but it has supported her family and connected her to a wide audience. Ms. Wagenblast still uses it for performances and said it defines a part of her.

At the same time, she masters a different way of speaking. Her new voice, soft and lilting, is an expression of her true self, she said.

Ms. Wagenblast is undergoing her transition at a difficult time for people who do not conform to traditional gender identities. Conservative lawmakers in the United States have passed measures restricting medical treatment for gender transitions and requiring transgender people to use bathrooms and locker rooms associated with their sex assigned at birth.

Some of Ms. Wagenblast’s worst fears have come true. Strangers have mocked her appearance. Customers and acquaintances have slipped away. Her marriage is on the rocks.

Ms. Wagenblast, who now wears her hair in a short brown bob and the occasional touch of lipstick, has coped by focusing on what she has gained.

Her self-esteem has blossomed and she has forged a community with other trans women. She is finally living the way she always wanted, she said.

“If there was ever a time to do this,” Mrs. Wagenblast said, “it would be now.”

Pass or be shunned

Ms. Wagenblast grew up in a comfortable home in Cranford, a politically moderate suburb about 10 miles southeast of Newark. Her father was a toolmaker and her mother did administrative work. She has a younger brother and sister.

Even in a time when the language to express what she was going through was more limited than it is today, Mrs. Wagenblast certainly knew who she was.

At first it felt natural, and she wasn’t ashamed or afraid. She started feeling like a girl when she grabbed jewelry and makeup from her grandmother’s dressing table at age 4, she said. When she was six, she traded clothes with her best friend, who was a girl. In high school, she carried her books close to her chest, as girls often did.

Only later, as she grew older, did she start to think she was somehow wrong. She was bullied relentlessly as a child, she said. Her life was made miserable until she learned to adapt so she wouldn’t be shunned.

There were good reasons to be intimidated into silence. When she was a teenager, Ms. Wagenblast heard about a local music teacher who transferred and was fired. She had never met anyone like her, and they exchanged letters and talked on the phone. Mrs. Wagenblast felt a glimmer of hope, tempered by the harsh reminder that if she didn’t conform, she too would be rejected.

She met the woman who would become her wife at church on a warm summer day in the 1980s. The woman was about to start working as a teacher at the parish school, and their pastor asked Mrs. Wagenblast, then in her early twenties, to carry the supplies for the new teacher. Within a year they were married.

Before Mrs. Wagenblast proposed, she told her friend the truth. At the time, in the early 1980s, they could not imagine a world in which Ms. Wagenblast could live openly as a woman, and she vowed never to come out.

They raised three daughters together; Mrs. Wagenblast said they were each other’s best friends. But Ms. Wagenblast remained hopeful that one day she could live more honestly, she said.

Becoming Bernie

While Ms. Wagenblast started a family and hid who she was, her career took off.

She enjoyed radio journalism and worked at a station in Indiana before returning to the New York area as a traffic reporter for WABC and 1010 WINS.

Her signature performance came from the MTA, which runs the New York subway. She was working off-air in broadcasting when the authority offered her the job recording voice announcements around 2009, and she thought she would like something that could make people’s day easier as they navigate public transportation. She said she tried to make her voice sound friendly.

“I’ve always tried to put what I call a smile in my voice,” said Ms. Wagenblast, describing a rich and soothing sound that resonates beyond the screech of metal trains.

Her announcements are iconic, said MTA Acting Chief Customer Officer Shanifah Rieara: “Bernie is part of an exclusive group of people who have recorded subway announcements – each with their own story – that highlight the diversity of New York City.”

Ms. Wagenblast also made appearances for New Jersey Transit, which operates buses and rail lines connecting New Jersey to New York, and has recorded announcements on the AirTrains at Kennedy and Newark airports.

Even as her life blossomed, Ms. Wagenblast looked for ways to feel more like a woman. In her 40s, a therapist encouraged her to transition, but she said she was afraid people would make fun of her.

That started to change in 2017, when she downloaded a photo editing program that allowed her to see what she might look like with more feminine features.

Then she started taking hormones. She changed her legal name to Bernie – a shortened version of her old name she was already using – to quietly shed her former self.

By 2022, Ms. Wagenblast had increased her estrogen dose and started growing breasts. There was no going back, she said.

Freedom had a price. Her wife left, Ms. Wagenblast said, after realizing she did not want to marry a woman. Her relationship with her daughters is strained, she said. Mrs. Wagenblast is now picking up her agenda to avoid feeling lonely in an empty house.

Enjoying the spotlight

Her broadcast voice has made Ms. Wagenblast an integral part of the New York City subway. It paid her bills and connected her to people from all over the world.

Yet Ms. Wagenblast also took speech lessons to build a new voice.

Experts say voice therapy can provide many benefits for people in transition. For some, it is necessary to feel safe from transphobic attacks. For others it increases employment.

“It’s such a big part of someone’s communication quality of life,” says Wynde Vastine, a vocal coach based in the San Francisco Bay Area who focuses on transgender therapy.

Ms Wagenblast has been navigating her new life by attending Pride events and speaking at community forums to raise awareness of trans issues.

In one of the first such appearances, Ms. Wagenblast joined her neighbors at a public meeting in 2022 where Cranford residents discussed ways to make their community more inclusive. She raised her hand, steadied her nerves, bared her soul, and braced herself for blowback.

“It was very difficult for me to get the words out,” Ms. Wagenblast said.

Ms. Wagenblast said she was willing to move if her neighbors ostracized her. Instead she heard applause. Then she felt arms wrap around her in a hug.

“It was just a magical moment,” said Cranford Schools Superintendent Scott Rubin, who was at the meeting. “I kept thinking to myself, ‘Good for you, Bernie.'”

After hiding for so long, Ms. Wagenblast is now in the spotlight.

“If you’re already taking the subway, chances are you’re not going to avoid it just to avoid hearing my voice,” she said.

Audio produced by Jack D’Isidoro.