I charge rent to my partner. People call me greedy, but that's for good reason
Opening her monthly expense spreadsheet on her laptop Rachel Taylor, 29, enters this month's bills.
Then the carer turns to her boyfriend of 18 months and reminds him he has £350 to pay in rent.
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Bar manager Joe Hutchins, 26, looks up and grimaces before transferring the money to his 'landlord girlfriend's account.
“I charge my husband rent and I wouldn't have it any other way. He may be my lover and baby daddy, but when it comes to finances I am all business,” Rachel tells Sun Money.
“This Valentine's Day we celebrate our love. I will also celebrate my tough approach to finances.
“It's my apartment and Joe has to pay rent. His Valentine's Day gift to me could be roses and paying his rent on time.”
“I know people will troll me. Others will tell me that my attitude is selfish. I'm sure some people will argue that I take advantage of my guy and that makes me a bad girlfriend!
“When I told some of my friends that I was charging my husband rent, they were honestly shocked. In fact, someone told me I was greedy.
“At first I was shocked, but I'm not a doormat. I want good relationship boundaries and a clinical-business approach to money is the best way to do that.
Rachel's no-nonsense approach to her landlord and friend getting her husband paid at the end of each month is not unusual.
Half of people would charge rent to their partner
A survey by TurboTenant found that 51% of people would charge their partner rent to move into a home they own.
The research found that three in five women (59%) would charge their partner rent.
While a third of respondents would like separate rental agreements if they are going to live with a partner.
The research shows that financial security and the fact that more single women are buying property themselves than ever before are two of the main reasons behind the rise in “partner rents”.
In Rachel's case, she bought her two-bedroom flat in Exeter, Devon, three years ago for £130,000, with a £19,000 deposit.
“From the age of fifteen I worked part-time on weekends as a nanny. When I left school I worked in administration and healthcare while studying for a consultant qualification,” she says.
“I have saved every penny to get on the property ladder. The flat is nothing special, but it is a certainty for my future.”
Rachel's mortgage is £600 a month and she charges Joe £350 and she pays the remaining £250.
“I think what shocks people the most is that I make him pay more than half of the mortgage in rent,” she adds.
The couple split their other expenses fifty-fifty, including council tax, heating and water bills.
“We all pay our own telephone bills. When we go out we share the costs. It works for us,” she says.
I was shocked by her no-nonsense approach
Rachel's partner Joe
Rachel met Joe on Tinder when she swiped on her husband's profile in April 2022.
Rachel traveled to Truro to meet Joe a month later.
“He worked there. We hit it off and I visited again two weeks later,” she says.
“I've had a number of different relationships. I wanted a guy who wasn't just about 'looks' and who was genuine.
“In my previous relationship I had been generous with money and two boyfriends left me with debts they had incurred on my credit card. This time I wasn't willing to let that happen,” says Rachel.
“Joe was three years younger than me. I thought he would be a 'jack the lad', but he turned out to be a real goalkeeper.”
Joe moved to Plymouth within three months of their meeting to work as a bar manager.
“I invited him to move in with me, but told him he would have to pay rent. I told him that my past relationships had made me wary of mixing love and money,” she says.
Rachel explained that she wanted them to love each other, but that they would initially keep their finances separate.
“I was shocked by her no-nonsense approach. But I understood.
“I didn't expect a free ride. I had friends who left me bills and I respected Rachel because she was so businesslike,” Joe says.
How couples can handle money to avoid arguments
Working out how to manage your finances with your significant other so that arguments don't arise can be tricky, but there are methods that can help.
JOINT ACCOUNT
You both pay your salary into your bank account, but deposit the same amount every month into a third account.
Bills and general costs such as groceries are probably paid from this.
You both have access to your joint account so you can see how much you're spending.
PERCENTAGE METHOD
You have a joint account, but you pay different amounts into it.
This approach is often used when one person earns much more than the other.
For example, if you have fixed bills of £1,500 a month, and one of you has a take-home pay of £30,000 and the other £20,000, you could agree that the highest earner pays in three-fifths, or £900 a month, and the lowest earner two-fifths, or £600.
This has the advantage that the bills are equally affordable for both of you.
PERSONAL CONSENT
As the sole earner, you deposit money into your partner's bank account to cover his/her personal expenses.
This can work if one person is at home caring for the children, or is away from work for a while.
You must decide together what a reasonable amount is and what you expect from it.
However, there are disadvantages and it is important to look out for signs of domestic violence.
DIVIDE THE LOAD
You have separate accounts and take responsibility for different accounts.
For example, you pay the household bills, but your partner pays for the holidays and the children's belongings. You can only split one bill, such as the mortgage.
This can work if you prefer to keep your finances separate and don't want a joint account.
Within two months of moving in, Rachel discovered she was pregnant and the couple welcomed their first child, Arthur, in March last year.
“Being pregnant didn't change my 'landlord-girlfriend' approach. It made me happy that I was so financially savvy,” she says.
Now the couple split the costs for their son equally.
“It's a relief that we can talk so openly and honestly about our finances. It's not a love topic, but not everything can be a bed of roses,” Rachel explains.
The couple also have an agreement to each save £200 or more a month in separate accounts so they can buy a house together.
“We set goals together. I have my apartment and if we buy a house together, I will sell this property or keep it rented out.”
Joe, who admits he often enjoys spending money on clothes or a night out, admits his partner's no-nonsense approach to money has taught him to be a better saver and take control of his finances.
“Every month I know what my rent is. I know what savings goal I need to achieve and what costs I need to pay,” says Joe.
“It has made us stronger as a couple and with our little boy it means we feel secure about our future and his future.”
Joe admits that if he owned a house and Rachel moved in, he would charge her rent.
“It is logical. I see so many couples fall in love and the relationship ends because of arguments over money.”
'Rachel is not controlling, she is sensible. She has inspired me to know my worth and be a better saver.
According to Rachel, many people claim that her approach is 'unromantic' and takes the love out of her love life.
“That is not true. If anything, it makes our lives easier. We never argue about money,” she says.
“That means we are more relaxed and supporting each other's careers and raising our son.”
“I think if more single people did this, they would be single on Valentine's Day.
“Basically, charging your partner rent keeps you together.
“I know people will argue that it's a taboo thing to do. Some say if you love someone, you shouldn't make them pay the rent.
Others will say it means I don't trust the relationship to last.
“Those comments make me laugh. They're just old fashioned. I love my husband. I love our life and I know it is a forever relationship. But when it comes to money, I don't think with my heart, I think with my head.
“As long as Joe pays his rent on time and gives me some flowers for Valentine's Day, I'm happy.
“I would rather have him save more money for a house this month than spend money on February 14. Valentine's Day is one day, money and budgeting are forever.”