I’m a dating expert – here are the 8 warning signs that you may be in a relationship with a narcissist

Even the kindest and most caring people can be selfish sometimes, but could the person you’re dating actually be a narcissist without you realizing it?

Luckily, a relationship expert has revealed the eight red flags to look out for, from your partner being ‘too attentive’ to ‘blaming everything on you’.

Tina Wilson, the British founder of Wingman, told FEMAIL how nArcissistic traits include having an unreasonably high sense of one’s own importance and seeking attention and admiration.

When dating, a narcissist will often fail to understand or understand their partner’s feelings, which can lead to the relationship breaking down, the dating expert said. But catching the signs early can save you heartache.

Here, Tina reveals the top eight warning signs that your new love could be a narcissist…

1. They are too attentive

Tine warned against dating someone who feels almost “too good to be true,” explaining, “We all have our quirks that make us human, but a narcissist will often lure his victims by being everything that he thinks his new partner would like.

‘This includes being thoughtful, caring, a little jealous and always present or thinking about you, even answering texts and calls when you need them. Be careful, this won’t last long.’

She added that it shouldn’t be confused with the honeymoon phase “when you both want to see each other and communicate non-stop.”

“This seems more selfish and satisfies their needs more than yours or your blossoming relationship,” Tina insisted.

‘If things seem too good to be true, don’t sound the alarm bells, but pay extra close attention to their actions to be sure which way things are going.

“I’m not saying you should ditch them yet, but stay alert and proceed with both eyes open.”

2. They constantly give themselves admiration from others

“Be aware when they say, ‘People say I’m great,’ because a narcissist likes to constantly tell stories about how great people think they are or how they are celebrated,” the relationship expert said.

“These statements point out the biggest red flags – ‘my boss says I’m the best,’ ‘People love me’ – all of these comments are made to reinforce their belief system, because they truly believe that if they say it, it will be so it will be. So.

‘Try turning the tables and see what happens. Discuss your own achievements or experiences and see how your new partner reacts.

“If the conversation suddenly magically has a way of putting them back in the spotlight, they’re probably exhibiting narcissistic behavior and not celebrating you.”

3. They are never wrong

Tina said, “Stop and pay attention when you find yourself questioning your own belief system or version of events.”

She claimed that a “true narcissist” will never admit when he is wrong. ‘If anyone doubts what he says; it will be met with an offensive or hateful response, usually involving abandonment, to make them feel better,” the dating expert added.

‘A healthy relationship should bring out the best in you and should not bring out insecurities or feelings that do not suit yourself or are belittled.

“Ask yourself if you feel like you’re changing for them, but at your own expense? Some time for self-awareness is critical to assess the version of events, the emotional impact on you and whether your well-being is at risk.

“Taking the time to put things into perspective will help you think clearly and decide whether your new love is indeed exhibiting narcissistic behavior.”

4. They gaslight you

“Narcissists will try to make you dependent on them because their opinion of themselves is so exaggerated that they think the attention they give you will keep you safe,” Tina insisted.

“Then they start showing their true selves and start criticizing your behavior or the way you dress, which makes you doubt yourself.”

“If you brought up any of these conversations, they would throw it back at you and say they never said that or you’re being too sensitive. In the dating app world we call this gaslighting.

“If you feel like things are in gaslight territory, communicate early and set your boundaries and see if positive changes happen.”

‘Rely on your friends and family as soon as possible. Maintaining a support network is very important because it is common for people who find themselves in a relationship involving gaslighting to often withdraw from friends and family.”

5. They seem to live in a fantasy world

Tina said, “Did they tell you some fantastic stories about their jobs or connections, all of which sound so plausible and real that upon first meeting you would never wonder why they would lie?

“But if you question the authenticity of such claims, you will get an explosive response that is not appropriate. Manifesting hopes and dreams is one thing, but living a fantasy life that turns out to be fictional is a great cause for concern.

‘Handle the situation calmly and smartly. Show curiosity without giving away skepticism and listen clearly to what they are responding to.

‘You want to avoid a defensive response, but also address any concerns strategically to understand why they are exaggerating or lying.

‘Social media can be helpful in discovering a new person and the absence of an online presence should once again set alarm bells ringing.’

6. They’re all about you

The dating expert explained: ‘Projection is a very clear and direct sign that you think you would recognize straight away, but many of us have been fooled into believing that we have upset or hurt the narcissist, when that is not the case.

‘While they tell us how cold we are and how unloving we are lately, when this is exactly the behavior they are exhibiting and not the other way around.

“Be aware that projection in relationships can be a manipulative tactic to turn things against you. Trust your own instincts.

“If they continue to accuse you of upsetting them when in fact there is no basis for their accusations, then you are probably in a relationship with a narcissist and should walk away. You can never change them because they consider themselves perfect.”

7. They are the king/queen of the castle

‘The ego is from the face of the earth. Many successful people have a slightly inflated ego, but no god complex, but a narcissist will believe that he is special and that no one will ever reach his level,” says Tina.

‘Therefore, they will talk their way through partners and when they are no longer useful, they look for another partner who will not question their lies. They will cut you off.

“Find out if you’re at the end of a long line of people they’ve been on dates with. If they keep looking for partners because they clearly can’t keep their ego in their back pocket, accept that you’re number two and ultimately be emotionally prepared for the next time they’re likely to cut you off.”

8. You stop listening to your friends

Tina warned, “If you show signs of withdrawal, your friends will notice, because a narcissist often makes us question our behavior and doubt ourselves.

“Remember, a classic sign of narcissists is that they encourage you to withdraw from your friends or loved ones in any way possible, all for their own benefit.

‘It’s normal, especially in early relationships, to spend more time together as a couple as you get to know each other, but have you stopped listening to good advice from the people around you? Have you disabled them? Do you feel that your own behavior is changing? These are clear warning signs. Friends know us best and if they are true friends, they only want the best for us.

‘Remember that your friends really do know you better than anyone else, and when your friends in a relationship say your partner is controlling or wonder why you don’t seem like yourself, they want to help you. Don’t push them away, talk, it will help.’