Have I failed as a parent?

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“I think what we did when we sent him away was we just postponed the inevitable. And the inevitable was very ugly.”

Rick Reiss was afraid for his teenage son, Gabriel. Gabe struggled with depression and mood swings, and no therapy or medication seemed to work.

But when Gabe became violent, Rick wasn’t just afraid for his son; he was afraid of his son. Rick and his wife felt like they had to do something drastic. So they made the decision to send Gabe to a wilderness therapy program.

Nearly 18 years later, father and son talk about the decision that changed their lives and how their relationship has grown now that Gabe is an adult.

You can read Rick’s original Modern Love essay, which came out in 2005: here.

Modern Love is hosted by Anna Martin and produced by Julia Botero, Christina Djossa and Reva Goldberg. The show is edited by Jen Poyant, our executive producer, and Anabel Bacon. The show is mixed by Daniel Ramirez and recorded by Maddy Masiello. It features original music by Pat McCusker, Rowan Niemisto and Diane Wong. Our theme music is by Dan Powell. Fact check by Naomi Sharp.

Special thanks to Daniel Jones, Miya Lee, Mahima Chablani, Nell Gallogly, Jeffrey Miranda, Renan Borelli, Nina Lassam and Julia Simon.

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