Shameless men question me on the street even after I tell them I have a boyfriend… it’s terrifying
A woman has revealed the moment men ‘questioned’ her about her relationship even after telling them she had a boyfriend.
Mary Johnson, 27, was sitting in a shopping center in Milton Keynes waiting for a friend when she was approached by a man she had never met before telling her she was ‘gorgeous’.
The student said she felt “uncomfortable” being alone and tried to turn him away, using the excuse that she “had a man” in an attempt to be polite.
In video footage, secretly filmed on her phone, the persistent stranger asks questions like “how long have you been together?” to try to catch her.
Although the student nurse is single, she admits she used the excuse as a tactic to politely reject him because she feared things would get ‘bad’ if she bluntly ‘stopped it’.
Mary Johnson (pictured) was minding her own business in a shopping center in Milton Keynes when she was approached and had hoped to gently let her questioner down by saying she had a boyfriend
However, the ‘shameless man went on to interrogate the 27-year-old singleton with questions like: ‘how long have you guys been together?’
The student has encouraged other women to secretly record their own similar interactions after her encounter left her feeling ‘fed up’
The encounter left her feeling ‘fed up’ because she wanted to be ‘left alone’ and now she hopes to encourage men to be more aware of women’s boundaries – even if they find someone ‘attractive’.
Mary posted the video online with the caption: ‘So guys here are now trying to figure out if you really have a boyfriend or not… Some men have no shame.
‘They just can’t take no [crying emoji] whether you are polite or rude about it. We can never win.’
Mary, from Luton, Bedfordshire, said: ‘I saw him walking past and looking at me when I was on the phone.
‘I saw him go into the shops behind me where I was sitting. The next thing you know, he was standing right in front of me.
‘He said, “You’re beautiful, do you have a husband?”
‘I felt uncomfortable. I don’t really like it, especially when I’m alone in the middle of a mall, so I said, “Yes, I will.”
“I felt like it was a kind way to turn him down. I thought, I’ll just try to be nice.
‘Then he started questioning me and said, “How long have you been together?” and this and that.
‘He didn’t believe me that I had a boyfriend.
“I said, ‘You’re really interested in my relationship, aren’t you?’ and he said, “Nowadays girls lie about having a man.”
‘I got tired of it because I tried to be nice and well-mannered. But then I started to get worried, I just wanted to get away. He was just so reserved [to accept it] and persistent.
‘There’s clearly a reason. Why do you have to interrogate? Just leave us alone.
‘I’ve come across this many times and I always get scared because there was one time in the past where I stopped it and the person got really mean.
“As a girl it’s quite scary because you just don’t know how they’re going to react.”
Mary said she has been in similar situations many times in the past and still struggles to know how to approach them as “a time in the past where I shut it down and the person became very mean.”
Commenters, as well as Mary’s real-life friends, expressed their condolences after she shared the clip
Mary suspects that the “interrogation” she faced may have been due to other women using similar excuses in the past.
She was worried and relieved when her friend came to meet her, but says she has faced similar situations in the past, even claiming a man asked her to stop on the highway to get her number.
Mary said: ‘It can be very dangerous. I’m still trying to figure out how to handle these types of situations. You never know how people will react, it completely depends on the person.
“There was a time when I was driving to work and this guy was flashing [his lights at] So I thought there was something wrong with my car.
“He flashed and pointed his hand like ‘Go to the emergency lane.’
‘I really thought there was something wrong with my car because I’m not good with cars at all.
‘I went to the emergency lane and he said, “Can I have your number?”
‘I had to give him my social media because I was afraid that if I turned him down and got back in the car, he would try to intimidate me while I was driving, which could cause me to crash.
‘It was terrifying. As soon as I got to my workplace, I blocked him and changed my username.”
Mary hopes that by sharing her videos online, she will encourage other women to secretly record a conversation when they feel unsafe, and also help men accept women’s boundaries.
Finally, she implored men to “just know the boundaries,” regardless of whether they find someone attractive
Mary said: ‘Sometimes you just want to go shopping alone with your headphones on and not be approached.
“It’s completely shameless and all women experience it,” she said. ‘Even when I talked to my male friends, they said, ‘I didn’t know it was to that extent.’
‘My advice to other women would be to make crafty videos, like I did, if you are in a similar situation.
“I’ve seen videos of them lashing out and showing boys’ faces, but that can make them aggressive.
“Do it more for protection so that if the car turns left you have proof.” At the end of the video you can quickly show their face.
‘Don’t blame yourself for how you react in the situation either, just do what makes you feel safe and protected.
“For guys, even if you find someone attractive, just know the boundaries.”