The marriage proposal that wasn’t

Bob Morris saw that something was changing with his elderly father: his car was clean, his manners had improved, and he had a gleam in his eye. He had a new “girlfriend.” Her name was Arlene.

Arlene loved Bob’s father, but she also set clear boundaries with him. She didn’t want to take care of him when he got sick and – despite what Bob’s father led Bob to believe – she didn’t want to marry him.

Today Anna Martin talks to Bob about his father’s latest love story. Then she herself talks to Arlene about a misunderstood marriage proposal and the limits of love.

Suicide is mentioned in today’s episode. If you are having suicidal thoughts or are concerned that someone you know is having those thoughts, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline number is 1-800-273-8255.

Modern Love is hosted by Anna Martin and produced by Julia Botero, Christina Djossa, Elyssa Dudley and Hans Buetow. The show is edited by Sara Sarasohn and our executive producer is Jen Poyant. The show was mixed by Sophia Lanman and recorded by Maddy Masiello. It features original music by Dan Powell and Pat McCusker. Our theme music is by Dan Powell.

Special thanks to Daniel Jones, Miya Lee, Mahima Chablani, Jeffrey Miranda, Renan Borelli, Nina Lassam, Julia Simon and Anna Diamond from Audm.

Thoughts? Email us at modernlovepodcast@nytimes.com.

Do you want more of Modern love? Read previous stories. Watch the TV series and sign up for the newsletter. We also have swag the NYT store and two books,Modern Love: True Stories of Love, Loss, and Redemption” And “Little Love Stories: True Love Stories in 100 Words or Less.”