Faye Winter breaks down as she reveals trolls destroyed her life after THAT rant
HER foul-mouthed outburst on Love Island sparked 25,000 Ofcom complaints and a barrage of online hate and death threats.
Now, Faye Winter has spoken out about the toll the backlash took on her mental health following her 2021 appearance on the dating show.
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The 28-year-old former estate agent from Exeter is fighting back tears and says she was in a 'dark place' after being abused over the explosive row she had with love interest Teddy Soares, where she accused him of trying to attract another islander find.
At times, Faye's social anxiety was so severe that her therapist had to take her to the grocery store.
Speaking exclusively to Fabulous for Shamed, a new YouTube series exploring the effects of trolling on six women, Faye says: “At one point when I came out of Love Island I thought I was the worst person in the world . Not many people get to see their shortcomings played out for everyone to see.
“Has it affected my mental health? Yes. Was I in a very dark place? Yes. Do I think I deserved the hate? No.
“But I didn't want to come out and talk about that side of it. . . I didn't want to sound like a cop.
“What I did, I did and I must take full responsibility for that. I have to take credit and say, “I messed up and I'm sorry.”
“And I've been saying that for over two years.”
The infamous incident sees Faye confront love interest Teddy Soares about footage taken during his stay at Casa Amor – the rival villa where islanders are seduced by a group of singles called Bombshells.
The footage was shown without full context, leading Faye to believe Teddy had cheated. Most of the viewer complaints focused on Faye's fiery behavior, with many saying producers should have intervened to defuse the situation.
The trolling Faye was subjected to in the aftermath was, in her words, “appalling”.
Scrolling through her blocked sentences on Instagram, Faye reveals she's had to leave out insults like 'slag', 'psycho', 't**t', 'hate her' and 'mentally ill'.
She is also forced to block vicious demands, including “die” and “kill.”
Faye is excited and says: 'People might think, 'She's just crying about it now because she wants to move away from it.'
'But I didn't do that. I made sure I never deviated from it. I always said, 'That was me and I'm sorry.'
“People make mistakes. I'm not going to blame it on anything other than me reacting wrongly to a situation. And that's all I can say.
Explosive argument
“There were a hundred other ways I could have reacted in that situation. I chose not to do that.”
Despite their explosive row, during which Faye allegedly used the F-word 57 times, she and Teddy finished third on the show and continued dating until last February.
When she announced their split on Instagram at the time, she thanked fans for “supporting our relationship and sharing the journey with us.”
She says: “I have apologized to him several times and I have spent 18 months of my life trying to make it up to him.”
She confirms that they are no longer talking.
While Faye believes trolling is “shameful,” she admits she agreed with some of the comments, many of which also criticized her appearance.
She says: “I wasn't in a good place mentally. I started to believe (the reactions) and that's hard. It's one thing to be deceived and think, “Okay, that's what you think, but I see myself differently,” but when you start to question it yourself, it gets really hard.
Faye had two breast enlargements, Botox and fillers before appearing on the show, and once she appeared on screen she received negative comments about her puffy lips.
Trolls labeled her a 'duck', 'fake', 'minging', 'disgusting' and said she looked 'like a man'.
Faye accepts she “went into a sort of frenzy” about filling her pout and ignored her parents when they begged her to stop.
She says, “I just wanted them bigger.”
But after leaving the villa she admits she was shocked by her appearance.
She says: “I came out and I saw my face in clips from the show and I thought, 'I don't recognize you anymore.' That was really sad.
“My lips were a huge talking point on the show and I was telegraphed about that a lot.
“But I could understand why – and that was really difficult. I agreed with the people.”
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Faye says she struggled for 18 months after Love Island: “It was bad. Especially when I lived far away from my friends and family.
“I felt so alone. That was a dangerous time for me.”
The stress caused Faye, 6ft 4in, to lose weight, slimming down to an unhealthy seven stone, and she eventually sought professional help.
“I couldn't eat,” she says. “I didn't do it because I thought I was fat. I was really stressed.
“I never thought I was one of those people. I didn't even know what fear was.”
At her lowest, Faye asked her therapist to accompany her on shopping trips.
Through tears she says: “That was difficult. That was hard.
'Didn't recognize myself'
“I felt like I was in a fishbowl and the death threats and abuse made me worry about my safety.
“I had no one to call if something happened.
“I couldn't even go to the supermarket by myself. My therapist had to come with me. She really helped me.
“She taught me the 5-4-3-2-1 rule to control my breathing and help me focus on what I went to the store for.
“This focuses on five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell and one thing you can taste. I also went to a store with her, but went to the aisle by myself and asked her to wait outside so I knew she was there for support.
Faye moved back to her home town of Devon from London last March and is now happily single and living with her golden retriever Bonnie.
She's had her lip fillers dissolved and is making a conscious effort to ignore her Instagram DMs.
Looking back on that difficult period when she lived in the capital, she says: 'I lost my way. I lost Devon, I lost my friends. I no longer had the job I loved.
“I didn't recognize myself in the mirror. I didn't recognize what was in it. And that was tough.”
Faye, who signed up for Love Island after a producer contacted her on Instagram, says she doesn't have a “big ego” and didn't go on the show to get fashion deals but was “in for the experience”.
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She says, “I was put on that show because I'm a big personality, but when I came out, my personality shrank.”
She remembers the drive back home to Devon as the turning point for her mental health, saying: 'It was like the biggest burden had been lifted from my shoulders.
“At that moment I thought: OK, I can do this. I'm going home'.”
But Faye has no regrets.
She says: “This is all personal development. I didn't need new friends. I didn't need a new place to live. I didn't need another relationship.
“I just had to come back to myself, but come back to me as a person who had grown.
“And that's what I did.”
Faye is looking to the future and wants to continue supporting animal charities, including Guide Dogs UK, and is calling for strong regulation in the aesthetic industry.
She is no longer in therapy.
She says: “Now when I look back at the comments trolls have sent me, I know I am a good person with a good heart.
“You don't have to agree with the things I've done. I don't agree with some of the things I've done.
“But I learned from them.”